


Dear One

by BlairDrakko



Category: Transformers - All Media Types, Transformers: Prime
Genre: Action, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dark, Gladiators, It's a sad one., M/M, Multi, Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rape/Non-con Elements, Slavery, Slow Build, Slow To Update, Transformers AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-24
Updated: 2019-05-01
Packaged: 2020-01-31 08:54:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 4
Words: 22,593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18587929
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlairDrakko/pseuds/BlairDrakko
Summary: Soundwave's origins have always been shrouded in mystery, the silent but undeniably fearsome mech an enigma to so many of his fellow Decepticons.Where did he learn to fight so ruthlessly, why did he hide behind his mask, and why was he so unrelentingly loyal to their Master Megatron?His story is one of pain and loss but through it, he may just find the key to his salvation...





	1. Dear One

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! New story. Tags will grow with it. Planning on keeping it short buuuut... Not promising anything. I know me too well. It is gonna be a sad, eventful, chaotic ride, so hold on tight!

A femme lay on a small dirty berth before two mechs, her plating a dull grey, its color fading as the virus EnSic (Energon sickness) tore through it. She vented raggedly as she tried to stay conscious, her spark far too weak to do much else, but still she fought to live even though she knew better than to hope for good news from the medic that stood above her.

“She isn’t going to make it, Banesaw.” The medic whispered to his companion in the darkness of the small room.

The larger mech, known as just Bane to most, snorted in disgust at the news. “Then she is no use to me.” He said coldly as he scanned over his dying slave. **_Another one taken by this fragging sickness. At this rate I am going to go out of business!_**

The medic at least had the spark to look appalled with the other mech’s easy dismissal of the femme. “Right...” He said darkly, shaking his helm as he looked back down at his shivering patient. “She have any family that needs to be alerted?”

“One bastard, but I am keeping him. Fraggin femme still owes me her buyer’s fee and it falls to him to make it up.” The slave owner said with a grunt, his red optics peering over to where said sparkling sat curled into a ball in one of the dark room’s corners.

The medic glared at the other mech, “You aren’t seriously considering making a fragging sparkling work for you, are you? I know this is Kaon be there are rules against that slag even he…”

“He isn’t going to be a pleasure bot, medic. I am not that stupid.” Bane hissed out, the last thing he needed was this medic looking into his dealings. “No, he will work as an errand runner for now, till he is old enough to work legally.”

The medic shook his helm again, he hated dealing with slave owners, especially those in the pleasure district. Their slaves would sell their frames for the bastards for vorns, many contracting disease from it all in the hopes of paying off their Master’s buying fee, and earning a proper designation and maybe even a caste number. Yet, like the poor femme here many never made it out of their debts. They just worked until they died, their frames sent to the smelting pits like just another heap of scrap metal.

The fact that this femme had a sparkling was an oddity in and of itself as pleasure bots normally underwent procedures to assure they could not carry. How she avoided it, the medic could only guess, of course now her sparkling would be all alone. “No Sire to take him in?”

Bane laughed heartily at the other mech’s foolish question. “A Sire? Ha, that is a good one mech, let me just call up every one of her clients from the last ten vorns to see. Of course there’s no Sire, frag… The fact that she still had a functioning gestation chamber was surprise enough, she couldn’t work for near five solar-cycles after the brat was born. Who would claim rights to some bastard from a whore anyways? I swear this fragging femme has caused me nothing but issues. I say good riddance.”

A small whimper came from the sparkling in the corner, but Bane ignored him as he looked over the datapad he held and frowned. “So how much is this gonna fragging cost me? I will add it to the kid’s fees.”

The medic looked over to where the strange little sparkling sat, his spark aching for the young one. “Call it a gift, alright? I don’t need my conscience burdened by letting you add more on his debts.” He grated out, slowly gathering his tools as he prepared to leave.

“Whatever mech.” Bane said with another snort. He lifted his helm and looked over at the sparkling. “You got five kliks then I want you to wash up and meet me in my office. I will sort out a designation for you then and a slave I.D.”

“He… He has a designation…” The femme coughed out, her frame arching as agony rippled through it with each cough.

Bane laughed, “Sure he does F41, but now he needs a proper slave name, femme. I am only looking out for him. If he walks around with no I.D. and no designation who knows who could pick him up, right?”

The femme blinked weakly up at her Master but nodded and he smirked before turning to her offspring. “Five kliks. Don’t be late.” He stated sternly as he walked to the door and left.

The medic glared at the closed door for a moment before looking over at the sparkling. “I, I am sorry.” He said quietly as he walked to the door. “I will give you some time to say… Well, I will be out in the hall if you need me.” He opened the door and with a heavy sigh stepped out leaving the sparkling and his dying Carrier to their last moments together.

The femme coughed once more, her frame seizing as she tried to control the violent shudders that came with them. “Come… Come here, dear one.” She choked out after the attack had passed, her purple optics dim with pain but always loving as she watched her sparkling unfurl himself from his corner and walk over to her.

She cooed at him, frowning when she noticed the tears that were sliding down his faceplates. “Ohhh, hush now little one, it will be alright. I need you to be strong. You can be strong for me, yes?” The sparkling dipped his helm, his optics looking to his pedes as he nodded silently and she sighed at the sight. “I love you so very much, you know that right?”

Her sparkling nodded once more, but still his optics stayed firmly pointed at his pedes. “Dear one, please look at me? I want to see your beautiful faceplates before... Well, I just love looking at you.”

He lifted his helm, wiping at his tears as he tried to smile for his Carrier. “Momma…” He called to her softly and was gifted with her beautiful smile in return, a smile he wouldn’t have much longer…

“Do not fear for me little one, we must all make the final journey to the All Spark, I am not afraid.” She assured him, reaching out to him with shaking servos and he eagerly, if not carefully fell into them, ignoring how weakly she held him as he snuggled against her.

“I am sorry, dear one. I am sorry I must leave you, but I need…” She had to stop as another bout of coughing began, her sparkling looking up at her worriedly as she vented painfully afterwards. “I, I need you to listen to Bane. I know, I know you don’t like him, but he can give you fuel… He, he is not so cruel, just listen to what he says, alright?” She looked down at her child, her dim optics filled with hope and fear for him but was pleased as he nodded at her request and she eased her helm back down to the berth in relief.

“Good boy. You will be alright, dear one. Remember what I taught you, you are vastly intelligent. D-don’t let that go to waste, but be careful where you show it. Remember no M-Master should know you are…”

“Educated, I know Momma…” He finished for her as he crawled up on the berth next to her, his little servo reaching out to wipe some drool from her intake and she smiled at him in thanks.

“Not yet anyways, dear one. Who knows, maybe one day this wretched caste system will fall, and you… You will be seen for the wonder of a mech you are.” She said gently, taking his servo in hers as her flickering optics looked at him desperately. “You are worth more than this system, my star. Never forget that and never, _never_ forget you have an identity, you have a _name_! Take their slave code, and use it where you need but don't let them take all of you! Fight, dear one… Fight for yourself, and your right to exist.”

She stopped as she coughed wretchedly, wet gasps coming from her as her servos shook more violently around his tiny ones and her sparkling knew, these were her last moments. “Momma… Please, please don’t go.” He pleaded quietly, his resolve to never ask her not to leave him crumbling as the light continued to leave her optics.

“I… I love you, dear… Dear one.” She strangled out, a trembling smile on her faceplates as she fell limply to the berth. “Don’t forget who you are my star, my dear one… My little Soundwave…”

Soundwave watched in silence as his Carrier vented painfully, watched as her optics fell to the darkness that she had been battling for so long, and listened as she whispered “I love you.” one last time before finally, she was gone.

He sat there, his optics unblinking, his tears dried, useless now that he was alone, and wondered what to do. He looked over at the door, wondering if it had been five kliks yet, wondering if Bane would even come looking for him if he didn’t go to his office…

“I hate him, Momma.” He whispered to the dead frame, his servos still gripping onto hers tightly. “I, I don’t wanna work for him. I am sorry but... But I, I’m gonna be bad, Momma… I’m gonna run.” He said nervously, his spark hammering as he admitted the truth to her dark optics.

He leaned forwards, his dermas brushing against her cool helm as he kissed her gently. He allowed his processor to dream in that moment, shuttering his optics as he pretended he would open them to see the beautiful, wonderous smile that always followed his kisses but reality... Reality was never in his favor and as he creaked his optics open and looked down his spark ached as all he found before him was that dull empty look of death staring back at him instead.

“I love you Momma... So, so much. Thank you for, for loving me. G-goodbye M-Momma.” He stuttered softly as he laid her servo down upon her chest and pushed his little frame off of the berth.

He walked slowly towards the doorway, hating to leave the only bot that ever meant anything to him, yet knowing he couldn't stay before creaking the metal door open just a little to peek at where all of the bots outside were.

Once it seemed the hall was clear, he slipped his frame out and ran to his Carrier’s room. He was careful not to be spotted, but since it was so early in the morning most of Bane’s other slaves were still with their patrons so the halls of the slave quarters were mostly clear, he just hoped no one had cleaned out their little room yet.

He made it there quickly and luckily without incident, opening the door quietly and creeping in, relieved to find their meager possessions still inside. He grabbed one of his Carrier’s mesh bags and began filling it with all the fuel he could find. There was hardly enough for a few solar-cycles, but he knew starvation well and how to cope with it, so he could make the low-grade last longer if need be.

He also grabbed the small med-kit his Momma always kept stocked for him, as he always seemed to scrape his plating while playing in the halls and lastly he grabbed his Carrier’s only memento, the only thing she had of worth, beyond him (as she would always remind him) a tiny crystal on a silver chain.

He smiled sadly as he looked at the scuffed and scratched trinket, remembering why she had kept it hidden from her Masters for so very long, or not just sold it for credits. _“One day, when you find a mate you may give them this.”_ She had said when she first showed it to him vorns ago. _“Its crystal is known as Dappled Eminence. It is said that whoever you give this crystal to you will be your true love forever, so don’t just give it away to just anybot!”_

He sniffled a bit as he opened his subspace and dropped the necklace in before picking up his little bag and looking around the room that he had called home his whole life. Tears threatened to fall as his optics burned but he vented in deeply, wiped them away, and went for the door.

 ** _No more tears! Gotta be big now, gotta be strong. Momma would want me strong._** He thought to himself as he creaked open the door, but he looked over his shoulder just one last time before he left, his spark heavy and apprehensive in its little chamber.

  ** _I will find a home one day, and it will be better. I will make this world better, for you Momma. Don’t worry for me, rest peacefully. I, I love you…_** And with that last thought he crept out of the small room and ran off into the unknown.


	2. Megatronus...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this earlier and just needed to finish editing it... Though I am certain mistakes remain... ANYWHO, chapter two...Yay!

{Three vorns (years) later.}

 

“Hey, get outta here kid!”

Soundwave looked up as the shop’s owner began to stomp over to him, the mech’s optics blazing hatefully as they scanned over the youngling’s ill-fitted plating. “We ain’t got nothing for beggars.”

 He frowned, his helm tilting as he looked over the shop’s wares. It had been three vorns since he left Bane’s ‘care’, and amazingly enough he had survived living on the streets. He always was a fast learner, and quickly taught himself how to move silently and efficiently when stealing, or how to fight and escape were he caught.

Fuel was a constant worry, but recently it was his plating that was giving him the most trouble thus why he was currently standing outside of a frame shop looking longingly over the selection. He had grown out of his sparkling frame long ago and had had to make due with whatever plating he could find, sometimes even pulling plates off the dead that lined many of the streets in Kaon. He imagined he was quite a sight to behold being covered in numerous different colored plates, many of them far too large or too small for his frame, but it wasn’t an unusual sight for Kaonites sadly.

“Go on, GET!” The frame merchant yelled as he waved his servos at Soundwave, the lithe youngling jumping back as the mech slammed the door in his faceplates.

Soundwave sighed, cursing himself for looking at the mech’s wares for too long. He knew better than to draw attention to himself and now would need to find a different shop to steal from. He kicked at the sands under his pedes, his tanks rumbling hungrily as he walked down the main streets of Kaon.

Most bots paid him no mind, his ugly plating helping him blend in easily with all of the other uncasted that resided in Kaon. They all had their own concerns to deal with anyways, many hurrying to their shifts in the mines, or others making their way to the arena.

In early Kaon there wasn’t much to bring in tourists. Most of the rest of Cybertron saw Kaon as the filthiest place on the planet and Soundwave would have to say he agreed. The only redeeming quality of the city was its main street vendors, and they were only there because of the arena.

If not for the gladiatorial matches Kaon would be little more than a cesspool of decay and disease, a place to throw uncasted and let them rot, but as it was the arena brought in hordes of bots from all over Cybertron. Each greedily paying to watch other bots fight to the death.

 ** _A sick pastime for the rich and famous._** Soundwave thought bitterly as he scratched at his far too small leg plating. He sighed once more, shaking his helm as he focused on his current task, finding some plating he could steal.

He walked down one of the busier streets, one he normally avoided because it was one used more frequently by tourists and most didn’t take kindly to homeless mechs, no matter how young they were.

He kept to the shadows for the most part, making sure to keep his optics and audials open for any bots that would give him trouble when he heard a commotion further down the street. Curious as to what every bot was clamoring about he slipped through the crowded streets, his optics wide as he searched for the reason for all of the bot’s excitement when he noticed a parade of gladiators walking down through the streets.

 ** _I had forgotten, it is champion’s week._** He thought to himself as he watched all of the hulking mechs walk along, many of them waving to the crowd, or roaring mightily but there was one at the end that caught Soundwave’s optics most of all.

The mech was silent as he walked, his helm lowered as he ignored the fans around him and seemed to be concentrating on something in his servos. **_Or perhaps he is focusing before his fight. I wonder if he is a new fighter._**

Soundwave didn’t keep up with the gladiators, too many died too quickly to keep track. It was an awful job for a slave, in his opinion, as its life expectancy was far lower than even those that worked in the mines, but it was better than those locked into the pleasure district. **_Better than most I suppose if you are good at it, if not well…_**

He did envy the fuel and plating the mechs were granted though, and had even heard of how some of the gladiators got their own rooms, and decent pay but again, that was only if they were good enough to survive  their matches. 

He wondered how long this mech would last in the ring, or who he was. He knew a few names of the gladiators, hearing them echoing through Kaon’s streets late at night as the crowds cheered. The newest favorite was a mech called Megatronus, but he didn’t know what the mech looked like.

 Soundwave tilted his helm as he scanned over the silent silver mech, he was big but seemed far less violent than his fellow gladiators. He appeared far too thoughtful, too stoic to be a gladiator, but a slave hardly even got a choice in their ‘profession.’

 ** _He will have to learn his place, just like all of us from Kaon do eventually._** Soundwave thought bitterly as he looked over his mismatched plating.

Sometimes he regretted leaving Bane, but he knew had he stayed he would have just needed to become a whore for the mech just like his Carrier was and he had promised himself, promised _her_ that he wouldn’t forget who he was, forget his worth… Though, he wasn’t certain if sleeping on the streets and being a thief was what she had in mind.

He slunk back to the shadows after a few more moments, once again forcing himself to stay on track. He was wasting precious time, and with the parade maybe it would be easier to grab some plating without being noticed.

He nodded to himself as he made his way along the street, his optics constantly scanning until they fell upon another frame vendor. **_Alright mech, you can do this!_**

He vented in deeply, making sure to keep his servos still as he walked nonchalantly up to the shop. He could already see a few pieces that would fit his legs well enough, and they were just on the outskirts of the racks so all he would have to do is walk by, grab them, and continue on as if nothing had happened.

He waited until the parading gladiators were right in front of the shop he had picked out, the crowd surging towards them as he slipped in between them all silently, but as he neared the racks a sliver of doubt crossed his processor and he almost froze because of it. **_This seems too easy._**

One thing Soundwave had learned during his time on the streets was to trust his instincts. He had learned that invaluable lesson not long after his Carrier died, when he had finally run out of energon. It was his first time trying to steal from a cart, and he had been far too small and ignorant to understand the importance of invisibility. **_Or understand the true capacity Cybertronians have for cruelty._** He thought angrily.

He had been caught by the vendor, and the mech had beaten him senseless right there on the street. No bot came to his aid, nor looked twice as he cried and screamed for help before the shopkeeper had finally tired himself and threw Soundwave’s broken frame to the ground and rolled his cart away in disgust.

In a way Soundwave now knew how lucky he was that the mech hadn’t killed him, but he still had nightmares about that day, even now. He had healed from the attack eventually, but with no fuel to aid in his recovery, it had been slow going. He remembered dragging his frame away from the streets and finding a little alleyway to curl up in and tend to his wounds with his Momma’s med-kit.

Apparently being beaten was far more devastating than just getting a little scuff on his plating, and because of that one attack he had used up the entire kit. Shaking with exhaustion he had then taken the mesh bag he still had, wrapped himself up in it and fallen into a fitful recharge.

It was then Soundwave began to truly understand the state of his new life, and how truly alone he was. He had allowed himself a moment to mourn that night, finally falling to the tears that he had held back for so long. It would be the last time he would feel any pity for himself, and after that night he promised that he would learn to fight for his life, his worth, just as his Momma wanted him to, and ever since then that was exactly what he had done.

He began by watching other thieves, watching those that failed and those that succeeded. He watched how they moved unseen through the streets, ignored by all, invisible, nameless bots just trying to survive, bots just like him.

Through the passing vorns he also learned how to tell when storms would come, or where to find the right spots to recharge in; moving as the thieves did, never staying in one place for too long so that he was a stranger no matter where he went. He learned to become a shadow, a ghost that no one knew existed and honestly, he preferred it that way except… Except for the loneliness that consumed him.

Sometimes he would watch other thieves working together, and he wished he could find a friend to work with, recharge with, or just someone to talk with. He hardly spoke now, his voice all but static after not being used for so long, but with that silence he had also learned how many bots truly didn’t listen, and that was a lesson in and of itself.

So many of bots he saw would just ramble, talking _at_ their companions instead of talking _with_ them. It seemed such a waste to the young mech. Here they had someone to talk with, to share things with and yet so many took it all for granted. What he wouldn’t do for a friend sometimes…

 ** _Arrgh! Focus!_** Soundwave vented out in frustration. **_What is it with me today? Why can I not stay focused? Is that what feels so off? Should I just walk away?_**

He grimaced as his leg plating pinched the delicate protoform of his leg, and set his faceplates. **_If I don’t get plating soon I will be stuck with having exposed protoform._**

Perhaps it was from growing up in the pleasure district but Soundwave understood what it meant to other bots if you were to walk around without plating. Many of Bane’s slaves were forced to do so because their patrons requested it and he remembered how many of the mechs and femmes felt worthless, and powerless by being so exposed. It was degrading really, but the wealthiest patrons used it as a show of power over the uncasted, not that they needed to do more than flash their caste card to do the very same thing.

He knew he wouldn’t make it long on the streets in just protoform, especially with the storm season starting, acid rain and protoform never went well together, and the burns never seemed to heal on protoform. He _needed_ this plating, good plating too. Plating that didn’t come from a dead mech, that would crumble under even the lightest touch. He needed to set his bar higher if he were to continue living on the streets and that meant stealing from wealthy vendors.

Soundwave knew how to steal from the poorer shopkeepers, it wasn’t something he was proud of, but it was a means to an end, yet wealthy vendors normally had bodyguards. Not just bodyguards, but well trained bodyguards that would not hesitate to rip even a sparkling in half were they caught thieving. He would need to be swift and careful while acquiring his prize.

He moved quickly, silently, his servos shaking far more than he wanted as the air of doom followed him. Something was going to go wrong, he knew it somewhere deep inside, but he had to try.

The crowd was loud and chaotic and there was music now accompanying the gladiator’s march, and it seemed all optics were turned away from him. He could do this! He just needed to stop allowing himself to get distracted! He needed to be more disciplined! He needed to be a shadow!

He was mere feet from his prize, his optics set on the glittering plating, spark hammering in his chassis as he reached out, and every so gently plucked them from the rack...

For a moment he could hardly vent, his pedes pulling him forwards even as his shock stalled all other thought.  **_I did it! I did! I was just getting myself worked up for nothing! I…_**

The hit to his helm came so quickly he hardly had time to notice the shadow that fell over him before he was sailing through the air, his frame crashing into the middle of the street as a huge mech followed after him. “DIRTY THIEF!”

Soundwave shook his helm, spitting out the dirt that had somehow ended up in his intake as the massive mech leaned down and gripped him by the throat and lifted him high.

“Filthy begger.” The mech grated out, his optics bright and angry as they took in the starving mech he held. “You’re dead, scum.”

Soundwave’s optics bulged as he struggled in the mech’s servo. **_I was such a fool!_** He dropped the plating he had stolen, swinging his fist at his captor apparently catching the larger mech off guard as he immediately dropped Soundwave and went stumbling backwards.

“What the frag is this!?” A voice called nearby and Soundwave blanched as he saw one of the gladiators coming closer to him.

“He is a fragging thief, fifty credits to whoever takes him down!” The bodyguard cried, and suddenly more of the gladiators looked at Soundwave hungrily, and the youngling realized just what kind of a mess he had created for himself.

Fifty credits was nothing to laugh about, many mechs worked a whole vorn and received less. Frag, if Soundwave wasn’t the prize in this endeavor he may have even have tried to take a mech down for that much also, as it was though…

He picked himself up, his pedes falling into stance as he stood before the few gladiators that began to circle him. He knew he was small, but he had learned numerous ways to defend himself, plus most mechs underestimated him, and his secret weapons.

One gladiator laughed over the gathered crowd. “Be the easiest fifty cred I ever made.” He said jovially and the crowd laughed with him that was until he jumped at Soundwave and with a tug and a grunt found himself suddenly on his chestplates eating sand. “Wh-what the frag!?” He exclaimed, his helm rising just to howl in agony as Soundwave’s pede came up and kicked the fragger right under his oversized chin.

The crowd went wild as the gladiator’s glossa flew through the air, apparently having been bitten clean off as his jaws snapped tight, and a spray of energon rained over the sands as the gladiator moaned and rolled on the ground miserably.

The other gladiators now looked at Soundwave more cautiously, each of them spreading out in a wide circle around him, and the youngling felt his spark freeze. He was a skilled enough fighter, but going against gladiators and so many at once? He had caught the first by surprise and that was really the only thing he had going for him. **_Need to keep them guessing then run the first chance I get._**

Before another could lunge at him, Soundwave moved first, his small frame like lightning as he rushed at one black and green mech. The gladiator gaped at his gall, lifting his arms up to protect his helm when Soundwave suddenly lowered himself, his frame sliding in the sands and slipping right between the mech’s legs before extending two of his tendrils out and wrapping them around the mech’s ankles as he pulled hard.

“Arrrrgh!” The mech yelled out as his legs were pulled out from under him, landing like his fellow warrior had, face first in the sands, but Soundwave didn’t have time to revel in the mech’s fall as he immediately got to his pedes and jumped at another.

This mech, a smaller grey mech yelped in a very undignified way, his frame scrambling backwards but Soundwave was faster. He quickly extended his two tendrils, coiling them around the mech’s outstretched arms and yanking his frame directly at the mech’s helm.

“NOOO…  UHHHHH!” The gladiator fell silent as Soundwave’s pedes slammed into his faceplates and drove the mech to the ground. One of the gladiator's optics shattered as Soundwave bounded from his faceplates, his frame flipping through the air and landing gracefully in the center of the street.

“I am gonna rip your spark out, freak!” The second mech he had taken down screamed, his large frame barreling over to where Soundwave stood and the youngling almost smiled at the mech’s stupidity. **_Foolish mech…_**

 Once the mech was close enough Soundwave coiled the pistons in his legs tight before springing up over the running mech. He released all four tendrils as he flew, wrapping them around all of the mech’s limbs before sending the right commands and watching as bright blue currents of electricity sparked and crackled down his cables, effectively electrocuting the mech.

The gladiator shrieked as his frame seized, his optics flickering on and off wildly as energy coursed through him until he finally fell limp in Soundwave’s tendrils, and the youngling dropped him unceremoniously to the ground. **_There, three… Three down, there should be a path now for me! I should be able to…_**

A gasp escaped his intake as a shadow fell over him, and he turned back to find that young, and silent silver mech standing right behind him. **_How did he…_** He never got to finish his thought as the mech looked him directly in the optics, capturing his attention just long enough to distract him from the mech’s massive fist as it plowed into his unprotected chassis.

“Uhhhhhnnnnnn!” Soundwave moaned as he collapsed into himself. The irony that the first sound to escape him in so long was also probably going to be his last, did not escape him as he fell, yet was surprised when the silver mech caught him in his long, strong arms.

He looked up at the mech, fear and pain fleeting through his optics as he did so, but the silver mech just looked at him sadly. “You were a fool to get caught.” The mech said quietly, his deep voice echoing in Soundwave’s pounding helm as the world began to fade around him.

“Give him to me! I am gonna kill that fragger!” The little grey mech shouted as he stomped over to the younger gladiator but the silver mech didn’t flinch as he approached.

“Frag that! He is mine!” The shopkeeper exclaimed but when the mech that held Soundwave growled at them, they both backed away fearfully.

“I think he would be worth more alive than dead, mech. He is starving and still took three of you down. Anybot could see his worth if they tried.” The silver mech said evenly, his optics turning to look at someone in the crowd but Soundwave was too dizzy to tell who it was, or what was going on for that matter.

As far as Soundwave was concerned he was as good as dead now. He had screwed up, gone against his instincts, and now… Now he would pay the ultimate price for his mistakes. **_NO! No I need to move, I need to…_**

He tried to pull himself from the silver mech’s arms, but immediately felt like he was going to purge for the pain that flared up in his chassis and he wondered if the mech’s hit had been hard enough to crack his tanks. **_Arrrgh, he hits like a freight shuttle… How, how can I get away!?_**

“P-please…” He strangled out, his optics looking up to the mech’s pleadingly. “J-just p-plating…”

The silver mech frowned, his optics softening as he looked far too deeply into Soundwave’s. What the mech was looking for Soundwave didn’t know, but he hoped it would be something that would allow this mech to help him.

There, in that singular moment as many vied for his spark Soundwave realized something… He didn’t want to die.

He wasn’t allowed to! Not yet, not until he proved his worth, not until he showed all what he was capable of, not until he changed the world just like he promised he would… **_Momma, I may have failed you…_**

“Holy frag! What a fragging mess! Did that little scrapper do all this!?” A voice called from somewhere and Soundwave turned his helm to watch a mech burst through the crowd. It was clearly a Master walking up to him and the silver mech as many of the uncasted bowed to the mech and made way for him readily.

“Yes, Master Gearwrench.” The silver mech said with a slight bow, and Soundwave moaned in his arms as his tanks rolled sickly inside him at the motion. “He fought well, Master. I think he would be worth more to you than disassembled, Master.” The silver mech said, much to the surprise of Soundwave. He wasn’t certain what the young silver mech had in mind, but at this point he would do anything to keep his spark.

“Fragger just cost me two fragging mechs!” Gearwrench growled out, but his optics had a hungry glint to them as he scanned over Soundwave’s frame. “Ain’t nothing but broken plating, but still... Alright, bring him along, mech. I don’t have room for him, but I am sure I can find a buyer, hopefully help pay off the fragging medical costs of the mechs he decimated. You three, get these useless scrap heaps up and over to Rippers.”

The injured mechs groaned miserably, each knowing that the ‘medic’ was called Ripper for good reason and many of them would rather just suffer through their own repair systems than go see him, but they were slaves, and too much time on their backs led to being sold to worse Masters so they begrudgingly allowed their fellow gladiators to lead them to the insane medic.

“Two fragging mechs taken down by a near dead youngling, every time I think I have seen it all…” Gearwrench bemoaned shaking his helm as he looked over his shoulder at the two young mechs that followed him.

“You should get a hefty price for him, Master. All your buyers would need to do is see the damage he can inflict.” The silver mech said as he carried Soundwave following behind his Master at the expected distance.

“Pffft yeah, yeah. I still don’t know if _you_ are totally worth it yet. I guess I am just a mech that enjoys taking fragging awful risks.” Gearwrench grumbled to his youngest gladiator, but was happy to find the silver youngling looking at him with fire in his optics.

“I have not lost once, Master. Nor will I… Ever.” The silver mech said simply, as if there was no question in his processor that he would be victorious, and Soundwave found himself envying the mech’s confidence.

“Yeah I know. That is why I didn’t tell you to just rip the kid apart. I just hope he is as impressive once he is fueled properly, and has plating that doesn’t just slide off of his frame. I will say one thing, the kid can attract masses, if I had the credits I would keep him myself.” The slave owner grunted out as he pushed through the now very large crowd, apparently drawn in by Soundwave’s fight.

Soundwave groaned as his optics shuttered, unable to keep them open as the world swayed unevenly around him, but he was again surprised to see the silver mech smiling down at him just before everything went black.

“Slavery isn’t wondrous mech, but it is better than being offlined.”  The mech whispered to him, yet Soundwave could only moan in response and he heard the bot chuckle quietly in return. “Sorry about that. I would have pulled my hit but honestly, your cables terrified me. I had to make sure to take you down in one hit.”

Soundwave creaked open his optics just a bit to peer up at the larger mech, “Slave now?” He croaked out and the silver mech nodded grimly at him.

“If my Master finds a buyer, but I wouldn’t be too worried. The way you fight, it is a wonder you haven’t been noticed before. Like I said, slavery is no joy, but it will keep you fueled, and if you survive long enough it may even get you some benefits. Just don’t fight me, because I will always win.” The mech said with a cocky smirk and Soundwave frowned at him.

“Gladiator?” Soundwave asked incredulously, his processor reeling at the thought. He was to become a gladiator!? “Not gladiator, no skills.” He pleaded weakly but the silver mech merely smiled sadly down at him.

“Our destinies are never without unexpected bumps, yes? You shall become a gladiator to save your spark. It will not be a kind fate, but neither are the streets you cower within.”

“Ha*ve…” Soundwave’s voice fell to static, his vocalizer straining against the immense amount of use for the first time in vorns. “Have destiny…” He stuttered out, his optics blazing as he looked up at the mech that held him, and he was again surprised to find the same resolve in the silver mech’s optics.

“And what is your destiny, slave?” The mech asked, his optics cold and yet  oddly heated as he peered deeply into Soundwave’s. “What can a slave accomplish beyond the will of their Master?”

“Everything... Soundwave, Soundwave superior, others inferior.” Soundwave strangled out, his voice course and filled with static as his optics shuttered and the world fell dark.

“Soundwave is it?” The silver mech’s voice filtered through the haze of stasis. “I am pleased to meet you Soundwave, you may call me Megatronus.”


	3. Letting Go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter three! Sooo, yeah, planned on this being five chapters but I am awful at keeping stuff short. Still not planning on it being a novel (or several like I do) but yeah... Also, be aware warnings might change. Not sure just yet, but Soundwave does have a pretty wretched time before the Decepticons and such sooo... Yeah. Ok, new chapter, sorry for errors.

Soundwave stood before his new Master silently, his optics dim and helm hung low as the mech meticulously scanned over his frame with his fiery optics.

“Not much to look at, Tread.” Another mech grumbled from a small table he was sitting at in the corner of the room, and his Master grunted in agreement.

“No, but from what I have heard the kid fights like a beast. Gearwrench wouldn’t steer me wrong, he knows I only deal with the best.” His Master, evidently called Tread said gruffly. “Needs plating badly, that will be a hefty cost to add to his debts. I need you to radio the usual place, but I think it will take a special order, never seen frame work like his. Lift your helm slave.”

Soundwave did as his Master asked, but kept his optics down. He was feeling a bit better now, one of the first things Tread had done for him after the negotiations was allow him to be repaired. It had surprised the smaller mech, but he wasn’t about to complain. Yet, with those repairs and the fear of his spark being snuffed out now gone, the _reality_ of just what happened was finally hitting him and as he stood there, being scrutinized, judged like nothing more than a tool, he couldn’t help but feeling terrified.

 ** _I am a slave now, the very thing I ran from for three vorns._** A sense of despair filtered through his spark as his Master twisted his helm this way and that, ordering him to open his intake, his thick digits pushing in as they tested his denta. **_I am nothing now, nothing but what my Master wants of me…_**

He tried to ignore that fact, tried to reason with himself that this was better than being offlined but as his fear and despair continued to grow, he found himself wishing he could go back in time and beg Megatronus to just kill him.

As his Master walked away, giving an order of plating to his assistant the small youngling thought of the silver mech who either doomed him, or saved him…  Soundwave wasn’t sure what that outcome would be from his actions.

He knew it wasn’t the silver mech’s fault, and felt Megatronus was truly trying to help him by letting him remain functioning, but his fear of his newfound situation was far too great to really appreciate what the mech had done for him.

He lowered his helm as he thought about what Megatronus had said to him as they walked to his new _home_ , well, what he had said once Soundwave became conscious again. The mech had promised his Master would find him a good owner, at least in the beginning and when Gearwrench had looked back at him with a sarcastic glare Megatronus had just looked at him evenly and nodded to which the slave owner grumbled a “It’ll cost you.” and continued walking.

Megatronus had nodded in return, his optics dimming only for a moment as some unsaid truth seemed to slip through his processor before looking back down at Soundwave. “You win three fights, three fights and you earn the right to a designation of your choosing. They will take it at first, see what you’re worth, but you can earn it back. Remember that, fight for that.” The mech said sternly, his optics blazing as they looked down at the smaller mech he held.

Soundwave had blinked up at him in confusion. **_Why was this mech telling him this? Why did he care? Did he care, or is this normally what gladiators did?_**

“You have already embarrassed three gladiators, they are known enough to request a fight with you, and will probably be your first opponents after they heal. Might be a singular match, or with them all at once.” Megatronus continued quietly and Soundwave found himself unable to pull his optics away from the mech’s fiery ones.

“But they will be angry, embarrassed and you can use that against them. Some mechs can control their movements while angry, some can utilize it to their benefit, but not these mechs… As you saw today.” The silver mech said with a smirk.

Soundwave had nodded numbly, his spark hammering as he listened closely to everything the larger mech told him. It had been hard to digest it all, and he wasn’t even sure now if it had all really settled in his processor given his shock, but he had tried.

There was something about the silver mech that struck Soundwave. Perhaps he had just been so desperate for some sign of hope, for some help from the universe that only seemed interested in testing him over and over again, but he found himself leaning into the mech’s arms the further they walked. His thin servos even gripped at the mech’s chest plates at one point, his digits desperately searching for a foundation in the chaotic storm he had landed himself in.

Now that he thought about it, he was amazed that Megatronus hadn’t pulled his servos away, nor had he chided at Soundwave’s obvious terror, instead he continued to quietly educate him on what his life would entail every solar-cycle from here on out.

“Strip down.” His Master called to him from over his shoulder, pulling the mech out of his thoughts abruptly and Soundwave nearly crumpled to the ground at the request.

 ** _Strip down… To, to protoform? In front of them both!?_** His frame began shaking then, his servos quivering more than they had after he had been beaten by the vendor so long ago as he raised them and began pulling off his mismatched plating piece by piece.

He started with his shoulders, pulling the odd purple and grey plating off and carefully crouching to set it upon the floor so it wouldn’t crash loudly when it landed just to reach up and painfully, mournfully pull off another piece.

“Hurry up kid! I need measurements, and I want you plated as soon as possible.” Tread growled out, his back still facing away from his trembling slave as he studied the datapads on the table before him.

Soundwave bit his lower derma, forcing himself to comply even as his optics burned and coolant began to fill them. **_NO! No pitying yourself! You are not just some tool, you are Soundwave, Momma’s Soundwave! I promised to be strong! I can do this, I must._**

For a moment Soundwave wished Megatronus was here with him, remembering when the mech had left after credits were exchanged how he had instantly felt abandoned and exposed. **_No! You have no friends Soundwave. You are a shadow, alone. It is better this way! Nothing lasts in this life, and bots are cruel. Just look out for you cause no one… No one else c-cares…_**

“Fraggit bot! Are you simple or something!? How long does it take to…” Tread yelled out, his frame turning and stomping over to the youngling in frustration just to stop as he looked over his newest slave’s shivering frame, and wet optics. “Arrrgh, great… Hey Deck, why don’t you go grab some energon, kid looks like he hasn’t fueled in solar-cycles.”

Deck looked up from his data-pad, his optics going from where Tread stood to Soundwave and back. “Yeah, alright boss.” He said with a nod, and stood.

Tread waited until Deck was out of the room before sighing and walking slowly towards the obviously terrified youngling. He stopped right in front of Soundwave, watching as the youngling’s optics looked away from him as he fought to keep the coolant from escaping them.

“Ever been a slave before?” He asked, his voice gruff as always, but softer than before.

Soundwave hated that he flinched a bit at the mech’s simple question, and honestly found himself uncertain how to answer it. He himself had never been a slave well, not one with a job, but he had technically been Bane’s property the moment he was created.

“C-carrier… P-pleasure d-district.” He stuttered out, his voice still filled with static from lack of use.

Tread arched his optical ridge in surprise. “Huh, thought the whor… Ahem I mean, I thought pleasure bots were fixed. And don’t forget my title, slave.” He said carefully. Some might consider him a hard aft, but he wasn’t about to make light of some kid’s Carrier.

Soundwave nodded jerkily, his arms wrapped tight around his half naked chassis as he trembled. “M-most are, M-Master. Momm… Carrier said Soundwave was a m-miracle.”

Tread snorted before he could stop himself, and felt a small pang of guilt as his newest slave sunk deeper into himself. “Yeah… Well, we will see what kind of miracle you are out in the ring.” He said as he rubbed the back of his helm and considered the youngling before him.

"Though, I guess you coming to me at all is some kind of miracle considering I am retired from the gladiatorial ring.” He pondered with a grunt and was surprised as the youngling finally did look up at him but quickly frowned at what he saw. “Frag kid, your optics give all your emotions away… We are gonna need to fix that.” He said quietly as he thought.

“I won’t be a gladiator, M-Master” Soundwave asked, hope glimmering in his spark for just a moment before the huge mech shook his helm.

“Oh no, you are gonna be one… Sorry kid.” He added as Soundwave’s optics dimmed instantly and he looked away again. “But, you will be one of the best because my training. That way when you go off to a current Master for the arena, you won’t be killed immediately.”

  ** _So, he is going to train me? Why? I will have a different Master after wards?_**  “W-why?” He asked meekly, his optics looking back up at his Master in confusion.

“ _Titles_ kid.” Tread said darkly, his optics blazing. “No sense getting beat just because you forgot to address your Master appropriately. This is the first important lesson you will learn from me, and the last time you get away with it without pain. Understand?”

Soundwave blinked at him, his spark pulsing quickly as he nodded. “Y-yes, Master. F-forgive me, Master.” He answered nervously, his thin frame shaking as he committed the demand to memory.

“Good, and to answer your question well, hmmm... Apparently Megatronus is important enough for Gearwrench to give him some sway in the mech’s choices. Kid thinks you are worth the debt that will be added to his buyer’s fee after what Gearwrench paid me to get you in here.”

Soundwave’s optics bulged. “Master Gearwrench paid _you_ , Master? For _me_?” **_But, but he was supposed to sell me. Sell me so he could make enough to repair the gladiators I damaged. Why would he…_**

“I don’t do this slag for free, nor do I do it cheap. Training gladiators is no easy fragging job, especially when you train the best, and I only train the best, kid. Or used to… Thus the higher ticket price for you.” Tread said with a smirk, “It will work out for Gearwrench in the end though, means he gets to keep Megatronus for at least five extra vorns, and given how the kid is doing in the ring now he will earn back every credit and then some.”

Soundwave couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Megatronus, a mech he hardly knew, that had already helped him keep his spark, also gave up five _vorns_ of his freedom to help Soundwave go to a trainer before being sold off to an actual gladiatorial Master. Why!?

Tread chuckled at the shock in the youngling’s optics. “Yeah, I was surprised too, but he did get some lessons for Megatronus out of me too. Not that I am complaining, fragging kid is a natural warrior, ain’t never seen anything like him. Alright, enough of the chatter, get out of that scrap plating so I can measure you.”

Soundwave’s shock turned to despair once more but he followed his Master’s instruction and took off every piece, keeping his right arm’s plating for last as it held the only thing he treasured within it. **_Momma’s necklace… What am I going to do with it!? Where will I be able to keep it? Will he take it from me!? What do I…_**

“Kid, my patience is better than most, but this is getting ridiculous.” Tread said sternly, his optics narrowing as Soundwave looked at him fearfully. He watched as the kid opened his subspace, and dug inside to pull out a thin chain with a ragged looking crystal attached to it, before finally taking the plating off.

Soundwave dropped his arm plate down gently, his servos curling around the necklace possessively as he held it tight to his naked chest.

“You can’t have that kid.” Tread said quietly, his servo extending out as he waited for the slave to give him the ugly trinket.

Soundwave focused on venting, his spark pulsing so quickly he was getting dizzy from the elevated amount of energon rushing through his fuel lines. **_Momma… Momma they are taking you from me again… Please, Primus, if you are real, if you exist, let me keep this!? Please? I don’t ask for anything more, but don’t let them…_**

“SLAVE!” Tread yelled loudly, his optics glowing angrily as Soundwave continued to hold the necklace tightly. “You will give that to me, _now_. Slaves have no identity, no possessions beyond what their Master’s allow, kid. Call that lesson number two, and I am being fragging kind in teaching it to you verbally, but if you keep up this defiance I have no problem imprinting these lessons on your frame, plating or not.”

Soundwave was shaking terribly now, his vents rapid and unsteady, but still he did not move. The necklace was all he had. He would lose his designation, his freedom, he was exposed before this mech… It was all he had of his past, and he wouldn’t give it up easily.

He raised his helm then, his purple-blue optics blazing just as brightly as his Master’s as he glared at the hulking mech and said one word that he knew would damn him the moment it came confidently, defiantly out of his intake. “No.”

 ** _Maybe there is something to this kid after all._** Tread thought proudly and he almost smiled until he reminded himself the lesson that needed to follow. **_Defiance is important, but the kid needs to learn what is truly worth fighting for, and very soon that will be for the gift of his spark, for the gift of living…_**

Soundwave watched the mech’s stance change, watched his fist pull back, and even noticed the slight flash of regret in his optics before agony ripped through his unprotected chassis. His Master’s punch sent him flying backwards, his small frame slamming into the wall behind him splitting the protoform there with a huge gash, but still he held to the necklace tightly.

“You will learn.” Tread said grimly as he stomped over to the curled up youngling, his pede soaring forwards as he kicked the kid right in his exposed faceplates.

Soundwave grunted, but didn’t make much more of a sound than that as he was beaten. He had never been attacked  without some sort of plating, and had no idea just how much of a difference even fragile plating could make until now, and it was an agonizing lesson to learn.

Had he not spent the last three vorns in near silence he probably would have been screeching for all the pain he was in, as it was he merely moaned as the fists and kicks continued to rain down on him. The barrage stopped at some point, whether it was kliks or breems, Soundwave wasn’t certain, but he did notice as Tread leaned down, the larger mech huffing as he scanned over Soundwave’s bruised and bleeding face.

“Give me the necklace.” He said simply, his servo going out as before and Soundwave groaned at the sight.

It was bad enough that the mech was going to take the treasure, but that he was forcing Soundwave to give it to him with his own servos just made everything so much worse. It was like he was making Soundwave give himself up, give his identity to this mech, his worth, his last piece of the only bot that had ever loved him, cared for him…

“Nnnooo.” Soundwave mumbled out through his bleeding dermas, his weak servos grasping at the chain desperately.

“It isn’t worth your spark, kid.” Tread said angrily as the youngling coughed wetly before him.

Soundwave growled, his processor glitching as he heard the sense in the other mech’s words. **_Maybe… Maybe I should just give it up… Give up and keep my spark… Momma… Someone, please help! Please…_**

“NNNNOOOO!” He screamed, his vocalizer crackling and sparking within him as he did so and Tread sighed.

“You will learn.” Tread said once more, his voice heavy as he stood. He grabbed one of Soundwave’s legs, dragging the hardly conscious mech behind him as he walked out of the room and into a hall.

Soundwave shuttered his burning optics as he was pulled painfully along the floor. **_He won’t take you away from me! He won’t! I won’t let him!_**

The youngling gasped as the pressure on his leg suddenly increased and he was thrown into a small closet space, the wound on his back burning as it hit the wall and slid down.

Tread looked at him evenly, his optics cold now and Soundwave found no regret in them. “I will return when you understand what is truly important.” Tread said before slamming the door shut, and darkness fell over Soundwave.

He laid crumpled on the floor for a while, his beaten frame squished in the small space as he simply vented in the darkness that surrounded him. He eventually unfurled his aching form once he calmed down, his servos shaking as he blindly felt around the space he was placed in.

It was small, very small, and he didn’t even have room to lay down in any direction. Nor could he extend his legs completely if he sat against the wall, which forced him to keep his legs bent as he leaned against the cold wall.

He wondered how long his Master was going to keep him in the little space, but found for now, it wasn’t so bad. The more he vented the warmer it became and being tucked in so tightly almost reminded him of when his Momma used to hold him.

He smiled sadly in the darkness feeling his dermas split more and energon slipped down his chin as he held tight to his prize. **_He didn’t win today. I didn’t just give up Momma, I fought, and I will continue to fight. I will._**

He groaned as he shifted slightly, his pounding helm lying against the cool metal wall as he shut his optics. In his processor’s optics he pretended he was back at his Carrier’s quarters. He chuckled as he imagined his Momma coming in after work, her optics dull and lifeless until they fell to him, and suddenly she shone brighter than the suns.

She would always rush right over to him and pick him up, tickling him until coolant fell from his optics from laughing so hard. They would then share her meager fuel amount, and his Momma would always complain about being too full so she could give him the rest of their fuel. When he was really young he used to eagerly take it always amazed at how she could be full off of hardly any fuel, but as Soundwave got older he realized she had lied to him for vorns and made her drink just as much as him after that.

Once their small meal was done it would be his favorite time of the day, when his Momma would empty out her subspace with all of the pamphlets or, old datasticks she could find during her time away, and teach him about everything and anything she could find information on.

He learned to read that way, do math by calculating her patron’s pay and how much debt she owed. He would sit and read the pamphlets to her, many times watching her fall into recharge as he did so, exhausted from servicing her clients all night.

She never let him know what she was forced to do every night she left, but he wasn’t foolish, and growing up in the pleasure district left little to the imagination as the night was often filled with screams both of ecstasy and sometimes agony.

He remembered one morning when she came back to their tiny room late. He had been fretting that perhaps one of her patrons had beaten her again and she wouldn’t be home until the bruises faded, but instead was gifted with her smiling faceplates as she excitedly told him to sit down as she pulled out a small package for him.

Soundwave wiped at his optics as he recalled the utter joy in his Momma’s optics as she watched him unwrap his present, her servos clapping excitedly in front of her as the thin wrapping fell away to reveal his first datapad. Apparently she had been saving up for a long while to get the little broken thing, and never told him.

 _“Do you like it, dear one?”_ She had asked so nervously and he had merely gaped at her at first before jumping up and hugging her tightly as he giggled with joy.

He had been amazed by the gift. Yes, it had a broken screen, and most of the buttons didn’t work, but the information that it held was stunning. He had held onto his Momma so tight after that, thanking her over and over again as she cried happily.

It took of a few nights of tinkering for Soundwave to get the hang of using the device, and soon enough he was hacking into its core mother board and extending its memory, or uploading all sorts of illegal documentation that was spread over the net which he also connected to illegally.

That little datapad helped his education soar higher than ever, and he still wished he had thought to grab it the night he left Bane’s. **_Not like I would be able to keep it…_** He thought darkly, his servos slipping over his Carrier’s necklace possessively as he came back to the present nightmare he found himself in.

He sighed, wishing he would just fall to recharge but his processor was too full, and the future was too unknown so he settled his bleeding frame into his ‘cage’ and let his thoughts wander until he finally feel asleep. **_Maybe tomorrow will be better… Maybe…_**

……………….

Soundwave awoke sometime later but he wasn’t certain how long it had been as everything was just dark around him and as an uncasted youth he had never had his chronometer set properly. He figured it had been a decent amount of time given how badly his frame ached but knew that could be from his beating earlier as well.

He gasped as he moved to sit up a bit straighter, the room’s cold surface making him shiver as it pressed against his sensitive protoform and he realized he was running a bit hotter than usual. He frowned wondering if he had a fever, and as a slight sickly scent filled his olfactory sensor he realized one of his cuts might be becoming infected. **_Well being thrown into a dirty hole with wounds all over me… It would make sense._**

He strained his audials, listening for any sounds outside of his door but couldn’t hear much. **_Hmm, I wonder…_** His servo reached out, blindly searching for the door knob and trying it before grunting in pain and falling back against the wall. **_Of course it’s locked, but at least now I know._**

Soundwave blinked in the darkness, his digits rubbing at the crystal he held as he pondered on how to pass the time in his cage, and ignore the pain radiating through his frame and now his tanks. He started by thinking of his Momma, but after a while that got too painful and when he almost started crying he changed to thinking on fighting techniques…

**_This will be alright, just need to stay busy thinking. I can do this…_ **

…

More time passed and as his discomfort grew, so did his fears. **_How long have I been in here? Does he even remember that he has locked me away?_**

Panic flared in his spark at that thought but he quickly pushed it aside and forced himself to think of other things. He thought of Kaon, of Cybertronians, conversations he had heard, images he had seen, until finally coming back to how he ended up in his current predicament.

Anger filled him as he recalled his foolishness. He knew it would go wrong and still he went ahead with the plan that was doomed to fail! He had been so stupid, and now he was a slave! He was to be a gladiator!?

He laughed bitterly, his frame shivering as his fever increased. **_Not much of anything right now, am I? Just a bot in a closet._**

He started thinking of the young mech Megatronus, wishing he had been brave enough to ask more questions of the mech. He wasn’t certain but he thought the mech looked around the same age as he was and that they were both placed in such awful circumstances it was really the first time he had something in common with anybot, well with anybot that ever would speak to him.

That Megatronus had not only spared his spark, but also added vorns to his debt for him was a strange mystery as well. Why would a mech he hardly knew do something like that? Why would he put himself out there for a nobody like Soundwave?

Was he just being kind? Did he expect something in return? What could Soundwave even give him? Would he ever see the mech again? That thought made his spark ache, though he wasn’t certain why. **_Well, he was one of the nicest mechs I have ever met… Maybe he is just nice? I just hope I never have to fight him._**

He smiled slightly, imagining what it would be like to have a conversation with the silver mech as he slowly fell back into recharge. **_I bet, I bet we could have been friends…_**

…

Pain rumbled through his tanks sometime later and he tried to force himself to fall back to recharge to ignore it. He coughed wretchedly, more than aware of how his frame wouldn’t stop trembling now no matter how tightly he curled into himself. He wished he knew how long he had been in here, maybe that could help him keep going?

**_What if it has only been a few breems? Or kliks? Am I just panicking for nothing? No, no don’t panic! Sleep, you need to rest or you won’t be able to heal!_ **

One thing was growing very clear though, and it made his empty tanks roil sickly inside him; some wound of his was definitely infected and the scent of it was awful, as was the pain.

He gagged a bit, his optics dripping coolant as he coughed and fire tore up his back. **_The cut, it is the one on my back, I just know it._**

He moaned miserably, his arms wrapped tight as he shut his optics, or… Or were they open? It was so dark where he was he couldn’t be sure unless he brought his helm close to the wall next to him and saw the dim blue light reflect back at him. **_Just recharge… Recharge and maybe you will be more healed when you wake? Please… Please let me rest._**

…

“Uhhhnnnnn.” A broken sound escaped his dermas sometime later and he startled at the sound of it. His spark hammered inside of him as he panicked for a moment, his servos scratching at the walls as he tried to remember where he was.

**_I’m, I’m locked away, remember? I, I am with Master… Umm… Master something, what was his designation?_ **

Soundwave whimpered as his back scrapped against the wall, and he felt something ooze down his heated frame. **_Oh no! Did I open it again?_** He thought wearily as he trembled in the darkness.

He coughed as the scent of infected energon filled the air, and worked through his starving systems to off-line his olfactory sensor. While he was at it he cut the power to his optics and a few other systems, saving what little energy he had for just the basic needs.

“Please…” He whispered to no one as he slouched limply against the walls that held him. “S-so c-cold.”

….

When he woke the next time, he wasn’t certain if he were dreaming or not as images passed before his off-lined optics. He saw Bane there, the mech screaming at one of his slaves as the poor mech cried. He saw groups of thieves laughing as they shared their bounty of fuel, and he watched from afar pretending to talk and laugh with them. He saw his Momma, her smile so bright and welcoming, just to watch in horror as the smile faded and she coughed and gasped as the light left her optics, as she left him…

“Momma…” he mumbled incoherently, drool slipping from his numb intake as he called for her. His whole existence was a haze of agony, and cryptic thoughts now. He couldn’t control what he was thinking anymore the thoughts and images came in waves. Each were dark and haunted, each tearing into him deeper and deeper.

He smelt death around him even though he knew he couldn’t smell anything. He heard the cries of pain, saw the dead frames on the streets of Kaon, saw huge containers of energon always just out of his reach…

 ** _I, I can’t think… I… I think I am delirious…_** A sudden burst of laughter exploded out of him then, his frame shaking harder as he found he couldn’t stop laughing. He didn’t know why he was laughing, there was truly nothing to laugh about… He was locked away, he had a fever, he was so hungry he felt numb, he was a slave now, he was in the dark, he had no friends, he may have been forgotten in here…

“Ahhhhh… Ahhhh… Nooo… NOOOO! NOOOOOOOOOOO!” His laughter suddenly turned to a deep wracking sob, and he screamed as his panic and despair consumed him.

“NOOO! PLEASE! PLEEEEASE!? HEEEEEELP!? HEEEEEEEELP MEEEEEEE!” He cried as loudly as he could, his frame falling over itself as he scratched at the door wildly. “HEEEELP! SOUNDWAVE IN HERE! DON’T FORGET! DON’T FORGET SOUNDWAVE! MOOOOOOMAAAA!”

He gasped raggedly, his processor glitching as he pleaded. “MOOOOMMMMAAA! COOOOME BAAACK! YOU FORGOT MEEE! NOT SHADOOOOW! SOUNDWAVE REAL! REEEAAAL! PLEEEASE!? Pleaaaase… Mo-Momma…”

He sobbed weakly, his frame curling into a shivering ball as the last of his energy left him. **_Le-let me die then… Let me be with her? I don’t wanna be alone anymore. Soundwave, Soundwave always alone. Always…_**

….

A screech sounded around him, but he didn’t move. **_Just sounds, just sounds like always._** He thought brokenly as he laid in the darkness.

“Give me the necklace.” A voice said, its volume thundering after not hearing much for so long, but still Soundwave didn’t move.

“Slave, give me the necklace.” The voice repeated more sternly and still he moved not an inch.

“No*o*o…” A fragmented reply fell from his cracked and damaged dermas, and the voice grunted in response.

“You will die, you _are_ dying.”

“N*oo*o…” Soundwave moaned out, frustrated with the annoying voice. He was trying to die, didn’t the voice understand that? Why couldn’t it just leave him alone?

“Perhaps I could try, Master?” A new voice, one oddly familiar called from further away.

“Fine. Here is his fuel if he complies, but _only_ if he complies, otherwise it will be you in there with him, I don’t care what Gearwrench says.”

Noises shifted behind him, but he ignored most of it until he felt freezing servos grip his shoulders and pull him backwards.

Panic ripped through his frame as he was dragged out of his room. “N*oo**OOOO!” He screamed as he flailed weakly against the massive servos that held him only to pause as someone called to him gently.

“Stop it, Soundwave.”

Soundwave moaned as he stilled, his fuzzy processor working to find the right commands until finally his optics blazed to life and he screamed at the light that blinded them. “Ahhhhhhh!”

“Dim them, it isn’t so bright in here.” The kinder voice said to him and he followed the instructions unconsciously relieved when images finally began to filter through the white haze.

He moved his helm a bit, his optics searching for whoever dragged him out when he nearly sobbed as Megatronus’s frame filled his vision. “Me-Mega*tr*nus!”

The silver mech crouched near his helm, his faceplates dark as they scanned over his frame. “You are not being very intelligent about this, Soundwave.” He said simply, his voice low as he shook his helm.

Soundwave growled at the mech, hurt that Megatronus would call him stupid for protecting something that meant so much to him. “Go a*way.” He strangled out, lowering his helm to the floor as he shut his aching optics.

“You are going to die for a necklace? What happened to you being so superior? Not very impressive to allow yourself to cease functioning for a trinket.”

Anger fueled Soundwave’s sickly form and he lifted his helm to glare at the other mech. “W*or*th it.” He said furiously as Megatronus narrowed his optics in disgust.

“Worth more than your spark!? Don’t be a fool! You think whoever gave that to you would think the same thing?” Megatronus asked quietly, and Soundwave found himself frozen by the question.

“I…” He started weakly, his resolve falling apart as he thought about what his Carrier would say had she been alive to see him now and discovered why he was in such disarray.

Megatronus’s optics softened as he smiled sadly at the mech next to him. “I imagine whoever gave you that would prefer you give _it_ up rather than your spark, no?”

Soundwave optics burned as he held tight to the crystal. “I, I…” He mumbled as tears began to fall from his optics.

“You are fighting for the wrong treasure, Soundwave. You should fight for your spark first and foremost. You are worth more than this necklace. I saw it the first day I met you. You are special, and meant for great things mech, so don’t give yourself to the All Spark just for some trinket. Fight for your life mech, because no one else will.” Megatronus said sternly, his optics bright as they blazed down at Soundwave.

“You are going to suffer as a slave. Life is pain Soundwave, especially for mechs like us, but there is beauty in it as well. That is what I fight for, and what I fight to give others as well.” The silver mech said with a small smile. “You almost lost your spark, and what good would that be to anyone? You can’t help slag if you are dead, but if you live... If you face this world’s nightmares and beat them you can then work to change that world. You can help make a better one, not just for but for others cursed by this wretched system. You could change everything… Just like you said, right?”

Soundwave nodded weakly, his spark oddly soothed at the other mech’s words and he realized, perhaps he had been foolish in fighting so desperately for the necklace. His Carrier would be furious with him for choosing it over himself, and Megatronus was right… How could he keep his promise to her, to change this world for the better, if he were dead?

He weakly unfurled his frame, his optics going to the crystal he held in his shaking servos. **_What do I do? Momma, what do I do?_**

“You need to become more to survive this Soundwave and you can, as I can, but that means we need to grow, we need to move forwards or the past will drown you. Trust me, I know.” Megatronus said quietly, and Soundwave found himself wondering what kind of nightmares the young mech had had to go through in his own life to get here, here giving advice to one just as young yet sounding so much older about it all.

“But, but I don’t want to disappear…” Soundwave admitted as he turned back to the necklace he held.

“ _That_ doesn’t define who you are Soundwave, and neither does your past. It is merely a foundation to stand upon, but down bury yourself in it.” The silver mech insisted as he pointed to the crystal. “If anything that has now become a tool, a tool you will use to take the next step in your story. If you give that up you will move forwards, and I think be stronger for it, but if you keep it… It will destroy you, but the choice is up to you.”

Soundwave watched as Megatronus stood and slowly began walking towards the room’s doorway, but the mech stopped right before he left and peered over his shoulder at Soundwave. “I will let you think on that a bit before I get Master Tread, but just know I hope you choose to live. I would be rather upset to lose my first friend to such a useless death.”

 “F-friend?” Soundwave asked in shock watching as Megatronus shrugged.

“Yeah, I mean… I don’t much about friendship, but I would consider you to be one, I think. I like you, and like talking with you. Haha, I guess that means we are friends, doesn’t it?” Megatronus asked sheepishly, a light blush coming over his faceplates and Soundwave found himself amazed at how young the mech looked then.

He didn’t know much about friendship either, he didn’t know what it was that made bots come together under such a title, or that it could happen so quickly with a mech he barely knew, but he did know it made his spark skip excitedly in his chassis and he smiled at the silver mech. “F-friend.”

Megatronus’s optics flashed just for a nano-second before he laughed. “Ok then, well… As your friend I say, stop being a stupid aft and get your helm on straight. I can’t be there to save you all the time, I need some help on your part mech.”

Soundwave nodded slowly still shocked that the mech considered him worthy of friendship when he shook his dizzy helm and made a choice, “W-wait?” He asked as he gripped the crystal tightly and brought it to his dermas. He kissed it lightly, his spark aching but far calmer than it had been in far too long as he said his final goodbye to his past, his youth, and most of all…

**_Momma, I was almost so foolish, but now, now I need to say my final goodbye. I love you, but have clung to you far too much, and far too long. I, I need to let you go Momma. I need to let my past go to become the mech that will change this world. Not just for you, but for me and, and many others._ **

He sighed, his fevered frame unfurling shakily as he made it to his knees and lifted the necklace high. “Gi-give to M-Master?”

Megatronus looked at him evenly, his optics bright and so very deep. “Are you certain?”

“Y-yes… Need to grow, learn, g-get strong. N-need to change.”

Megatronus nodded grimly as he walked over to Soundwave and gently took the offered treasure. “One day Soundwave, one day I hope you meet a bot that loves you as much as the one that gave you this did and maybe, maybe you can give them something like this in return.”

“Necklaces are nice, but giving them my spark would mean more.” Soundwave said softly with a smile.

“Then keep it safe, and keep it strong mech because now that is all you have. Treasure it. Oh and here, some fuel... Another thing to treasure.” The silver mech said as he tucked Soundwave’s necklace out of sight and handed Soundwave the small cube he had.

As the sickly mech drank the fuel greedily, but slowly he realized how much better it felt to give the necklace to Megatronus rather than to his Master. Maybe it was because the mech hadn’t demanded it,  or perhaps it was because he had let him choose, but he mostly felt the reason was because it wasn’t a _Master_ that was leading him forwards and helping pull him from this darkness but…

**_A friend?_ **


	4. We Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy biscuits, this chapter... Days... Days to write. I kept trying to keep this story short but then I would be like, well what about this, or that, and... BOOM!!!! Super long chapter. I will admit, through the You Are Safe Now story I don't really get into Soundwave's earlier years, especially considering his immense loyalty to Megatron and now that I am... Well DAMN! This was supposed to be a lead in for the next Chapter in To Begin Once More but now it is taking on a life all its own. Sigh... Sorry for errors, and as always thank you for comments and kudos, they keep me going. Phew, writing is tough work sometimes... Haha. OK! Enjoy...

{3 Weeks later}

“You are attacking too slowly, D45! Move your aft or lose it!”

Soundwave vented raggedly at the opposite end of the ring his Master had set up in his building, his servos shaking from exhaustion and pain as he held his weapon up high.

“Frag it, straighten your plating mech! You may be too small for it, but that is no excuse to let it compromise your abilities! Work with what you have! Remember to use your surroundings. Be aware of every aspect!” Tread reprimanded loudly from his end as Soundwave quickly fixed his arm’s plating.

He hadn’t received his new plating yet, his time in the cage and his recovery afterwards made it near impossible for his Master to get his measurements until recently so for now he needed to wear a spare set his Master lent him and it was huge. Not only was he already a thinner mech than most, but he was still only a youngling and all the plating Tread had was for adult mechs.

“Keep your legs apart, bend you knees, raise your sword!”

Soundwave fumbled as he tried to follow each instruction just to scramble backwards as the mech jumped at him. He swung his sword in desperation, parrying his Master’s first blow with a shower of sparks but completely missing the next and groaning as a large slice cut into his upper left shoulder.

“TOO SLOW!”

Tread lunged at him again, his sword arching high and Soundwave set his faceplates as he made to move to the right just to have the larger mech stop his advance completely, twist around backwards and catch his slave mid-escape.

Fire ripped through his chassis as he was knocked off his pedes, his back slamming painfully into the pitted grey floor and freshly earned scar screaming as he rolled onto his side and tried to stand. He knew his Master hated when he took too long to recover, and would beat him senseless until he finally got to his pedes so he learned to push through the pain and force himself up.

“Your optics give you away every time mech! Every time! I can be across the ring and know your plan before you even flinch!” Tread complained as Soundwave reset dizzily. “You need to move faster, you need to control the hints you give with your frame! THIS IS NOT PRETEND! THEY WILL KILL YOU! They _want_ to kill you, it will be your spark or theirs! Their sole purpose is to fight, to hunt, to kill! Get that through your helm before their SWORD DOES! ”

“Yes Master.” Soundwave said wearily, shaking his helm as he tried to keep his focus, berating himself for failing yet again.

He may have been a decent fighter out there on the streets but comparably to his Master he felt like a sparkling fighting against a giant. He had never fought with weapons before, never shot a blaster, nor swung a sword. Whenever he had fought on the streets it had been unexpected, and he normally used his tendrils, something his Master hadn’t let him use once yet.

“You rely too heavily on them! What if they are cut off in the middle of a fight, what the frag you going to do then?” His Master had said to him and Soundwave knew the mech was right, but still missed the comfort of battling with them. Not only that, but he was tired of always feeling like a failure. Everything he did was wrong always, and he was beaten constantly for it all as well, leading him to be even more of a mess the next day.

For solar-cycles this was his life, recharge minimally, fuel minimally, then fight for breems and breems and breems and then do it all over again.

Fight, fuel, recharge…

“Again!”

Fight, fuel, recharge…

“ _Again!”_

Fight, fuel, recharge…

“AGAIN!”

FIGHT, FUEL, RECHARGE…

_“AGAIN!”_

_FIGHT, FUEL, RECHARGE…_

**“AGAIN!”**

“Master Tread?”

Tread looked over his shoulder, his faceplates splitting into a grin as none other than Megatronus of Kaon walked into his training room. “Ahhh, Megatronus. I nearly forgot today was a…” The large mech never got to finish as Soundwave’s pommel unexpectedly slammed into his jaw.

He stumbled back with a groan, his unfocused optics watching as the small mech then swung his blade as he spun, slicing across his chestplates deep enough to draw energon before lifting his left pede and kicking Tread in the center of his chassis  sending him crashing onto his back plates.

Tread groaned as his vision cleared finally, and he looked up to find a heaving Soundwave standing over him, the mech’s blade pointed right above his throat cabling as he vented raggedly.

For a moment no mech moved or said a word, the only sound was the whirling fans of both Tread and Soundwave and the youngling began to fear he had made a huge mistake by using Megatronus’s distraction to take his Master down. **_Oh no, am I going to be beaten for this? Did, did I do wrong? He never said the fight was finished, and always says to remain vigilant and never turn away from…_**

Tread’s sudden and booming laughter jolted Soundwave from his fears and he looked down at the mech in surprise. “YEEES! Well done! That, _that_ is what I am trying to teach you mech! Oh ho, well done!”

Soundwave blinked at his Master, moving back quickly as the mech rolled back before rolling forwards quickly and springing to his pedes. He almost flinched as the mech clapped him on the back roughly, but he knew if he did he would be hit for it. “Well done, D45. Go get yourself some energon while I set up with Megatronus, you deserve it.”

Soundwave could hardly believe his audials, he had never been granted extra energon before! He bowed quickly, rushing over to place his weapon it its stand before racing to where the energon cubes were located. He wasn’t hungry, but he would sub-space the cube for another time.

Once he was done he hurried back over to where his Master was resetting the ring with Megatronus. The two were speaking easily with one another, and Soundwave found himself wondering how Megatronus seemed to be able to speak with all manners of mechs regardless if they were his better or not.

“So what did you say when he asked you?” Megatronus was asking as he hefted two large practice targets over his shoulders.

“Frag off, is what I told him. I ain’t taking in no royal brat no matter how much you pay me. Fraggin wretches. Think they have all the rights in the world cause they’re caste twos and are rich.” Tread spit in disgust as he brought a rack of blasters over.

Megatronus chuckled at the older mech, his optics rising as Soundwave approached them silently. “Good job Sou… Umm, D45. I think you surprised Tread well enough to keep him going for at least another thousand vorns.”

Soundwave blushed slightly, nodding in thanks as Tread laughed. “A thousand vorns!? Don’t you dare curse me kid! I earned my right to the All Spark, and I will fight for that fragging right eagerly.”

Megatronus frowned at the smaller mech. “You _want_ to go to the All Spark ,Master?” He asked in confusion and Tread scoffed.

“Megatronus, you get as old as I am you start looking at the world real hard and wonder what the frag is wrong with it.” The older mech sighed as he sat down on one of the benches in the room. “You two aren’t even in adult frames. You fight every day for your place so you don’t have time to look so deeply at what is happening on a wider scale but I will tell you kids, there is something wrong with this world.”

Soundwave tilted his helm as he looked at his Master, surprised by the mech’s haunted words and grim faceplates. He had never heard Tread speak like this before, but he had never really heard anything from the mech but orders and disappointment. To hear him speak so hollowly about the world, to see his optics harden and yet dim at the same time, it was something that stuck with the youngling.

“I have seen it, I _see_ it still.” Megatronus said quietly, Soundwave grimacing inwardly as he forgot to address Tread with his title, but for some reason the older mech merely nodded as he looked up at the silver youngling.

“Yeah, yeah you have, some of it at least but there is so much more.” Tread groaned as he rubbed his aching chin and thought. “This system, this functionalist society is ripping Cybertron apart, and those in charge don’t even see it, or care to I imagine.”

“Was it always this way, Master?” Megatronus asked, sitting on the floor before the older mech, and Soundwave followed suit, sitting next to the silver mech as Tread smiled sadly and shook his helm.

“No, no it wasn’t. Once upon a time a mech was worth what he was capable of, what he worked for… Not whatever some afts sitting at the top dictated for him. This whole caste system is the worst thing to happen to Cybertron in… Well frag, maybe ever and I fear it is going to be the thing that destroys it all.”

“Why… Master?” Megatronus asked, adding the title after Tread glanced at him pointedly.

“Bots are desperate, bots are dying. Look at Kaon. Look at the quality of life Kaon’s citizens have, and you know what, it’s not just here. Tarn is suffering, Uraya… Frag even mechs in Polyhex, or Lower Iacon! Everyone but the top three castes are dragging their frames through this nightmarish system, trying to make a life for themselves, for their families but the government that keeps them shackled to their twisted caste system don’t care nothing for their suffering! I mean, look at you two! Both younglings and already slaves. There was a time where that would have been considered appalling, now it is as common as the dead frames we step over in the streets!”

Soundwave and Megatronus looked at one another. They may not have known how the other got to this point but that they were both here, both slaves in Kaon it gave them idea of the horrors the other had faced so far.

“How would somebot fix something like this, Master?” Megatronus asked, his optics blazing as he looked up at the older mech and Soundwave felt something creep over him in that moment realizing that even though Megatronus was keeping his field tight his question, his emotions were so overwhelming that no amount of dampening could keep his fury completely hidden.

“Pfft, oh youngling… It, it would take a revolution. It would take the power of the helpless, of those that have been beaten and broken into submission to stand up and fight, fight for themselves as well as their neighbors. It would take both uncasted, and lower casted to come together and see the corruption we all live in. They suffer too you know, the lower castes. Beyond caste one and two… Maybe three, everybot suffers.”

“But castes have their cards, they have the freedom to travel all over Cybertron, they even have t-cogs. They can’t possibly suffer as much as we do… Master.” Megatronus said incredulously and Tread peered at him carefully.

“Never let your ignorance allow you to come to foolish conclusions, Megatronus. Just because you don’t know many that are lower caste, just because you know they have t-cogs and you don’t, _doesn’t_ mean their lives are so much better. To think so is not only ignorant, but plain dangerous. That is how the Senate views things, through clouded optics, don’t be blind! No, they may not be slaves like _you_ understand it but they are still forced into professions, into identities they may not want and like you, they can’t escape what the Senate has decided for them.”

Megatronus tilted his helm, his optics narrowing thoughtfully. “You are right Master, that was ignorant of me. Thank you for pointing it out.”

Tread laughed bitterly. “Well I have no problem pointing out mistakes, do I D45? Alright, enough of this chatter. Let’s get to training, yeah?”

The younglings nodded as they stood, Soundwave watching as Megatronus’s optics seemed clouded for the rest of the evening, distracted even.

Finally after numerous breems of practice, and Megatronus beating him soundly into the ground numerous times in matches and blaster competitions Master Tread allowed them some respite as he went to the wash racks. It was then Soundwave found himself on the roof of the training room with Megatronus, each of them lying on their backs as they stared up at the night sky above them.

Soundwave sighed wearily, his optics fighting to stay open as he peered at the stars.

“You have gone through some rough training with Master Tread haven’t you Soundwave?” Megatronus asked lightly and Soundwave reveled in the sound of the other mech’s voice.

For so long after his… After he left Bane he had no one to speak to, no one that would care if he lived or died and then at the end and when he thought all would be lost, Megatronus found him and helped him rise from his despair.

Frag, the mech helped him every week he showed up for lessons, pointing out things Soundwave could change, and encouraging him to try different disciplines or approaches to each attack, and best of all training days with Megatronus always lead to the two of them staring at the sky, not matter if it were night or day, and talking about life.

“Yes. He has taught me many things.” Soundwave said quietly and Megatronus chuckled darkly.

“Or beaten them into you.” The young mech said stiffly as he lifted himself up on one arm and scanned over Soundwave’s frame. “You still haven’t gotten your plating yet?”

“Negative. It is my fault though. I was foolish and must pay for my actions.” Soundwave said with a shrug.

Megatronus grunted angrily, “Mhhh… Fault is a fickle thing isn’t it? Who is to blame, the youngling that stands terrified, or the elder that beats the lessons into him…” He sighed heavily and shook his helm, changing the subject before he went down the dark road that always seemed to haunt his spark and processor. “So he has you for a vorn, and then you will be sold to a new Master? I hope it is Gearwrench but because of my recent victories a bunch of high castes have been forcing him to take on their slaves. I don’t know if he will have room for you.”

“The liberties of being a high caste.” Soundwave said bitterly and Megatronus nodded with a scoff.

“They get all of the freedoms while they live off of the backs of the poor and dying.” The silver mech said darkly, and for a moment both of the young mechs fell silent, each lost in their own thoughts when Megatronus vented nervously before turning back to his side and looking at the smaller mech seriously.

Soundwave tilted his helm curious about the other mech’s grim faceplates before turning to his side as well. He didn’t know Megatronus very well yet, but he knew that look in the mech’s optics and could tell his friend was struggling with something. “What is it Megatronus?” He asked with a smile.

“Soundwave, I know we are just slaves, that we are just kids and I know what that means to those around us. Frag, we both know what it means to be less than a slave, and that is… Well… Arrrgh…” Megatronus growled before sitting up on the roof and lifting his helm to the sky. “Can I tell you something without you laughing?”

The lithe youngling frowned and sat up. “Of course, Megatronus. I would never laugh at you.”

Megatronus smirked. “You might after…  Arrrgh, Soundwave I am tired of living like this.” The larger mech said quietly, uncertain if Tread was close by, or any Master for that matter. He placed his arms in his lap, his digits anxiously picking the grit between one servo’s seams as he tried to find the right words. “I am tired of being in the bottom pit of society, I am tired of seeing dead frames in the streets, I am tired of bots working their whole lives away just to starve, or die because of EnSic, or be killed in the arena… I just… Frag it, Tract died last night.” He said hollowly, his optics dim as they began to burn with coolant.

Soundwave lifted his optical ridge at that. He didn’t know the mech known as Tract personally, but Megatronus talked of him now and then, as he did all of his fellow gladiators. Tract was one that the his friend liked more than most, perhaps even enough to look up to the older mech. “I am sorry Megatronus. Did he die honorably?”

“No… No he didn’t.” Megatronus whispered, his helm shaking as he stared at his servos. “He died because of that fragging energon sickness. One moment he is laughing with us, bragging about how he was nearly out of debt; a few hundred credits and he would have been freed and now…”

Soundwave’s spark ached for his friend. He had never seen Megatronus look so sad, and furious, and just plain lost. 

“He just… He started coughing… We, we all _knew_ he was sick but hoped… He used to say to me, “Megatronus, just one day, that’s all I want. One day of freedom and then I can die like a true mech. Like a Cybertronian, with p-pride…” Megatronus’s voice cracked a bit and he wiped at his optics angrily. “I, I HATE THIS!”

Soundwave blinked at the mech’s sudden change in demeanor and watched as the taller mech stood then, pacing along the roof furiously.

“Why, why must _he_ die? What was his life? Did he have one!?” Megatronus spit out, his optics blazing as his fists curled. “NO! No he didn’t! He never had a _home_ , he never had a _family_ like he wanted, he never had a solar-cycle, NOT ONE of freedom! N-not… Not one. HOW IS THIS RIGHT!?”

Soundwave hung his helm. “It isn’t.” He said quietly his spark pulsing painfully in his chest as he wondered if he or Megatronus would share a similar fate as Tract as Momm… As his Carrier had.

“No, no it isn’t! And, and just listening to what Tread said in there, it is everywhere! EVERYWHERE and who is doing anything about it? Huh? NO ONE! No one is stepping up! No one is and yet they all see it!”

“They need something to follow, something to bring them together.” Soundwave said as he peered up at the sky and Megatronus froze at his friend’s words.

“What?” Megatronus asked oddly and Soundwave turned to look at the mech.

“You said everyone sees it, but without something to lead them, or somebot to bring them together they are just scattered masses. Master Tread was right, if all of the broken and bruised came together well… They would be a force. Yet it would be one without someone to lead them as they have no guiding light, no plans. They need a voice, and symbol to stand behind. Something that represents what they are fighting for and isn’t afraid to be seen. I think, at least.” Soundwave said with a shrug and a laugh but as he looked up to his friend he found himself frozen at the look in the other mech’s optics.

“You are right, Soundwave.” Megatronus said quietly his processor reeling with possibilities. He frowned as he considered the smaller mech’s words. “They _would_ need somebot to lead them. One that will fight for them, that knows how twisted this caste systems is more than most. One that has suffered with them, one that isn’t afraid to stand tall before the might of the Senate…”

Soundwave stood slowly, his spark hammering as he looked into the fire that blazed in the silver mech’s optics. “Megatronus?”

“Soundwave, you… You know how to read, don’t you?” The silver mech said carefully and Soundwave paled before him.

“I… Y-yes.” The smaller mech admitted. He knew it was dangerous for him to be educated, or any mech to know but Megatronus… He didn’t want to lie to the mech, to his only friend. “How did you know?”

“Your optics, they linger on Tread’s reports too long, skim it too intelligently, purposefully.” Megatronus said with a telling smile.

“Arrrgh… Master Tread says my optics always give me away.” Soundwave said with a sigh and Megatronus nodded.

“I personally think it is a nice thing to see truth in your optics. I can look at you and know immediately if you are happy, or sad… If you are hurting.” Megatronus said as his optics dimmed.

Soundwave blushed, “I hate being so exposed. How do you hide your emotions so well?”

Megatronus’s faceplates hardened for a moment, “Practice.” He said with a snort. “Down in lower Kaon, the underground, you learn to be careful not to show fear or others will see it and you can kiss your aft goodbye. I suppose I have just learned to adapt it to only ever show what I choose, for the most part. Anyways, I was wondering if… If you could teach me?”

“Teach you to read?” Soundwave asked and the silver mech nodded with his own light blush.

“Umm, yes. I don’t know how to read, or how to spell but, but I, I have such things in my _processor_ and if I could only get them out… Well, well I think being educated is a valuable asset, and that you are… It is incredible, Soundwave. You are one special bot, and continue to surprise me.”

Soundwave shifted in his over-sized plating, scratching as his arm plating pinched along his protoform. “Th-thank you, Megatronus. I, I would be honored to teach you.” He said with a smile and Megatronus smiled brilliantly in return before jumping at the smaller mech and picking him up and pulling him into a hug.

“Thank you!” Megatronus exclaimed and Soundwave laughed as his pedes hung feet from the rooftop. It was the first time he had been hugged in vorns, and he had forgotten how much he missed it, unconsciously wrapping his arms around the larger mech as he held him tightly back.

Megatronus paused, his helm lowering as Soundwave snuggled into his frame. **_Poor mech… I wonder when the last time he was touched and didn’t feel pain because of it… Frag, when was the last time I was?_**

They stayed like that a moment more, each reveling in the simple joy of being held before Megatronus slowly lowered his friend down and they separated with small embarrassed smiles.

“You are a good friend, Soundwave. I am very happy you are still functioning.” Megatronus said gently.

“As am I, about you Megatronus. You have done so much for me already without asking for a thing. Thank you, thank you for pulling me out of my storms.” Soundwave replied, his optics wide and honest.

Megatronus peered down at the smaller mech. “Well, I think we can both say we work to keep each other afloat in this nightmare and, and who knows… Maybe we can do the same for others one day? That is, if you’d like to come with me?”

Soundwave felt his spark skip. “Megatronus, you are the only friend I have ever had, and you mean a great deal to me. If you need me I will be right there, until the end.”

“Until the end.” Megatronus repeated quietly with a slow nod. “I like the sound of that, come on let’s head down. I am sure Tread is almost done, and you need to work hard if you ever want to take me on.”

Soundwave frowned as he pushed his arm plating up once more. “Primus forbid. I am terrified if that were ever to come about, Megatronus.”

The silver mech looked down at his friend grimly. “I will find a way to keep us from such circumstances, at least in regards to death matches, I promise.”

Soundwave nodded as he followed the silver mech back down to the training area but his spark still ached at the thought of ever having to face Megatronus in the arena. **_I don’t think I could kill him, no… No I know I never could, even if I were able to beat him. I wonder, I wonder if he could kill m…_**

“No.” Megatronus said suddenly and Soundwave looked up to find the mech peering at him over his shoulder. “No, I couldn’t kill you Soundwave.”

As the smaller mech looked at him in shock and confusion Megatronus laughed. “Optics, remember?  I may not be able to read Cybertronian but I can read you like a sparkling’s tale.”

Soundwave looked at him flatly, but felt his spark ease with Megatronus’s words. **_He said he couldn’t kill me… He may not be able to keep that promise, but at least I know that he wouldn’t really want to._** He smiled as he followed after his friend. In a world of slavery, especially a gladiatorial one where every mech was vying for glory by taking your spark; the fact that Megatronus didn't want to take his continued to amaze the small youngling. Not only that but that his friend seemed almost insulted by the thought added to his awe and to the level he saw Megatronus stand upon.

 _ **He is like no mech I have witnessed down here in the deep, dark depths of Kaon. I, I think he truly wants to make a difference and that... That means something...**_ Some mechs could make a difference elsewhere and he was certain that could be difficult but, but for a mech to make a difference in the waste, the dregs of Kaon... That was something else entirely.

_**Could he be the one we need? Could he be the symbol, the mech, the leader to stand behind? I wonder...** _

**_………………_ **

A few more weeks passed, and the blur of training began to become less terrifying for Soundwave. He and his Master (mostly) were both pleased as his fighting improved over that time, but Tread would always remind him, sometimes painfully, that he still had a long way to go.

He still didn’t have his plating, much to the ire of his Master, but the older mech figured it was because of his unique frame type. Soundwave was a little disappointed that he still hadn’t received the new plating, but as he had waited for over three vorns for it, he figured he could wait a bit longer.

The youngling slave learned to enjoy the simple things during that time; he learned the wonder of earning extra energon, even though it grew harder and harder to do so as he improved, and he also learned the simple wonder of having a friend and that was worth more to him than he ever realized it would be.

He got one day every week with Megatronus, and he reveled in the time they got to spend together. He would practice his hardest when his friend came and yet still found himself unable to beat the mech even once. Megatronus would always assure him he was getting better at the end of the night though, as they sat upon the roof and worked secretly on his education, but Soundwave wasn’t certain if the mech was just being nice.

At first Soundwave was uncertain how to go about teaching the other mech, but quickly found himself scanning about the training area for anything that had lettering on it, much like his Carrier used to do for him. He would take some of the labels from the shipping containers, or just scratch some letters in the dirt outside, always cautious of either Tread’s or his assistant Deck’s whereabouts.

Megatronus was the perfect student, always asking questions and making sure to clarify anything he didn’t understand. It was nice for Soundwave to finally feel capable in the other mech’s optics. Where Megatronus just seemed to handle everything so much better than him, he finally had something he could teach the seemingly flawless mech.

It even came to a point where Megatronus had acquired such notoriety and fame that his Master offered him a gift and the silver youngling had immediately asked for a datapad, much to Soundwave's excitement. That was when Megatronus truly started to flourish as a writer, much as Soundwave did vorns ago. With that datapad Soundwave helped lead Megatronus through the words, the messages he wished to express and then... Send them out over the net. It was a small thing, whispers in the dark corners of the Cybertronian networks, but it was also a beginning and the two friends were at least grateful to get those simple messages out, even if it ended with them being ignored, or erased. Being as young as they were they merely reveled in the defiance it helped seed within them, but they never expected more than to ask Cybertronians to think for a klik about what really was going on around them.

All in all having met Megatronus was possibly one of the best things that ever happened to Soundwave, even if it came with the weight of slavery attached to it. Megatronus had hinted at his discomfort in having been a key reason he was a slave now, but he never let it get further than a simple bitter remark here and there and Soundwave felt bad for the mech feeling guilty for his current predicament. Megatronus had saved his spark, twice really, he didn’t deserve to feel bad about that but Megatronus was always hard on himself for not being able to provide a better outcome, especially when he would come to training and find Soundwave in poor shape after messing up and being beaten for it.

The larger youngling never said anything to Tread about Soundwave’s limping or broken plating, but would glare at the Tread coldly though the whole day and always seemed to hit the trainer harder those days. It seemed to help in the long run because every time Megatronus was around Tread seemed to grow a little less brutal afterwards and even began to open up to Soundwave a bit more.

Soundwave was greatly surprised when the older mech actually spoke to him for a whole five kliks one day about his interest in art, of all things, and he eagerly listened to the older mech leading to more in-depth conversations as the days passed.

It seemed he was finally getting the hang of his new life, figuring out the rules of it all and learning to work within them without getting beaten when something suddenly shifted.

It was around the end of his second month when Soundwave noticed a change in his Master. The mech would drink now and then during the first two months but normally stayed away from high-grade yet, for the past  few solar-cycles he had been drinking rather heavily leading to later start times in training, and sloppy sets. Soundwave never said anything about the change in the older mech, fearing a beating if he were to do so, but figured it wasn’t so bad.

During that time Soundwave got to practice more with his tendrils finally as his Master sat and drank on the side lines. He also noticed how chatty his Master would get at the end of sessions when he was overcharged, the older mech would even laugh now and then and it was nice to see a less severe side of his Master, in Soundwave’s opinion.

Tonight his Master was complaining about how the artists in Iacon were all blind fools that had sold out, in his not so humble opinion, all except for some artist called Silverray but he had apparently died some time back thus getting a piece of the mech’s art was near impossible now.

“Poor artists, only truuuly worf big creds onsse they ceassse fun-functioning.” Tread slurred sadly as he sat across from Soundwave, both of them cleaning and oiling their weapons after a long day of training.

“It seems the worth of a mech is normally calculated unfairly by the masses, Master.” Soundwave remarked as he studied the sword in his servo carefully. Tread may have not been beating him as often now but if his sword had a speck of grit on it he knew that air of kindness could turn in a nano-second.

Tread laughed, raising his helm as he peered blearily at the youngling before him. “How the fffrag do you speak soooo well k-kid? For sssome beggar you sssertainly have quite the uhhh… In-intake on you.”

“I listened for a long time, Master. I never had any friends out there in the streets, but I used to sit on roof tops and just listen. Taught me a lot of different things and that is where I also discovered the importance of a good vocabulary. Mechs listen to somebot that understands the value of words, and the power they hold, Master. Megatronus understands this well.”

“Ohhhh, dat kid can talk a mech into building a zzzzap-horsssse farm in the middle of a sssity, I willz tell you.” Tread said with another booming laugh and Soundwave smiled at the odd reference. Tread leaned forwards, his frame swaying as he peered carefully at Soundwave. “Hey, hey how many vornsss are you anywaysss?”

Soundwave blinked at the other mech. “I don’t know exactly, Master.” He answered honestly with a shrug. His Mo… Carrier never gave him the exact date of his creation, and whenever he would ask she told him it was better that he not know anyways, something about how the number could mean something else to bad mechs, but he never pushed her for a clearer answer.

“Arrrgh, jussss as well I g-quess. I don’t know how oldss I am either, jusss old. Old and lon.. hiccup… Looonely.” The larger mech said wearily and Soundwave lifted his helm at the oddly sad sound in his Master’s voice.

“Master, have you always been alone?” He asked, the words slipping out of his intake before he could stop them and suddenly he knew he had asked a very bad question.

Tread’s servo had stopped moving instantly, his frame still and field tight as he stared at the ground unblinkingly. “Ssshud up and w-work, sslave. That’sss none of your, your busssiness.” He said darkly, his voice thick with static and bitterness.

Soundwave froze as well, uncertain why the mech suddenly seemed so furious and he desperately sought to ease his confusing error by making it worse and blabbering foolishly. “I mean, I… I am sorry I was just asking if you had a family, or friends. Ummm, why are you alone and without sparklings or…” He gaped as the larger mech threw his blade to the ground and stomped unsteadily over to him.

“I SAAAAID SHUUUT UUUUP!” Tread bellowed as he pulled his fist back and Soundwave whimpered unconsciously before it smashed into his helm. He went flying backwards, his sword clattering off to the side somewhere as his frame rolled and tumbled helm over pede numerous times until finally sliding to a stop.

Soundwave shakily raised himself to his servos and knees, his optics fighting to keep focus as he searched for his Master just to cry out as a huge pede came out of nowhere and slammed up into his unprotected chassis. “UHHHH!” Spots filled his already blurry vision and as his frame crashed back down to the floor he vomited violently, half processed fuel, and a bit of blood came from his intake as he tried to vent through the painful heaving.

“WHEN I SSSSAY SHUT IT, I MEEEAN IT SSSLAVE! You will learn yer PLACE if I havvv to BEAT it inta yaaa!” Tread screamed as he continued to wail on the gagging youngling until his knuckles bled before grabbing the back of Soundwave’s helm and draggin his limp frame across the floor.

Soundwave was hardly conscious at this point, his legs bouncing along the ground until his Master finally got to wherever they were headed and opened a door. “YOOOU WILL LEARRRRN YOUR PLAACE!” Was all he heard before he was thrown forwards, his frame slamming into a wall before the door was closed and darkness fell over him.

He must have lost consciousness at some point because when he woke he was in a tumbled mess and his frame ached terribly. Slowly, painfully he worked himself into a sitting position in the small closet and lamented. **_What did I even say? I was foolish to speak with him like a friend! What was I thinking!? I am just a slave to him, to the world! Slaves don’t ask questions!_**

Like before, he tried to ignore the pain that resonated in his frame as he leaned his bleeding helm against the wall and attempted to recharge. He promised himself he would break down this time, he was stronger than before and there was no way he would scratch at the door again like some animal. If anything his greatest concern was not being out in time to see Megatronus on his next training day.

**_Megatronus comes in a few solar-cycles; maybe if I am really good, and stay very quiet Master will let me out in time to see him. I am stronger this time, I know better. I can get through this, I know I can._ **

**_……………_ **

Megatronus arrived at the training center a bit early when his day came along. He had done very well in the last two fights he had had so as a reward his Master had not only extended his curfew, but allowed him to take off early today.

His long legs skipped steps as he made his way up into Master Tread’s main building yet when he opened the door he was surprised to not hear any sounds coming from the ring. **_That’s strange, normally they are in full swing at this point._**

Frowning he walked slowly towards the training room, his helm peeking in but he found nothing but some discarded weapons, which was telling in itself, but the dried pool of energon made his spark freeze in his chassis. **_Soundwave!_**

He raced down the halls to where he knew Master Tread’s office to be. When he reached the door he stopped himself from bursting right in and calmed himself enough to knock. **_Everything is fine, it was probably just a bad hit. Maybe they are at Rippers? Frag I hope not, we need a better medic in Kaon so terribly._**

He waited impatiently outside of the door, yet as the kliks passed and no answer came from the small room his panic grew. **_Where is everyone? Why were Tread’s always spotless weapons on the floor!? Why was there energon? That isn’t fresh, it has been there a day solar-cycle at least. WHERE IS SOUNDWAVE?_**

His patience burning to the end of its famously short fuse, Megatronus vented in and slowly turned the knob of Thread’s office door and pushed it open just a crack. “Master Tread?” He called respectfully into the dark room hoping his voice didn’t shake with the fear that filled his spark when he was suddenly hit with the scent of stale high-grade and filthy mech. **_What the frag?_**

He pushed the door open wider to find the normally immaculate office of the trainer in complete disarray. Datapads were smashed and scattered all over the floor, awards and trophies he usually had lined up neatly on shelves lay broken and mangled, and in the center of it all, snoring on top of a of a cube covered desk, slept Tread.

Megatronus scrunched up his faceplates as he stepped carefully into the room, shutting his olfactory sensor off for the scent that wafted from the older mech. **_It smells as if he hasn’t showered in forever._**

“Master Tread? Sir, it is Megatronus.” He said gently, uncertain how the mech would wake… **_If he WILL wake, there is enough high-grade cubes here to choke a war-whale._**

Tread snorted, his drooling intake mumbling something incoherent but otherwise he didn’t move.

Megatronus’s optics narrowed as he scanned over the older mech, his fear turning to frustration and anger with every klik that passed. “Master Tread! It is Megatronus! I am here for my training!” He said louder, not caring if the inebriated mech woke swinging, he would take him down.

Again nothing but groans and snoring came from the mech and the youngling forced himself to focus on venting. “MASTER TREAD!” He finally screamed, his optics blazing furiously when _finally_ the mech before him started awake.

“WHOA WH-what!? Wassa matter? What’s…” Tread lifted his pounding helm, his burning optics looking at the silver blur before him quizzically. “Whas the frag? Mega-Megatro…”

“Where is Soundwave, Master?” Megatronus asked quickly, afraid the older mech would pass out again any moment now and he wanted to make sure Soundwave was at least alright.

“Wassa… Who?” Tread asked again, rubbing his optics with one of his filthy servos.

“Sounnnd-Waaave, Master. Where is he?” Megatronus repeated slower for the mech hardly containing his contempt for the older mech now.

“Souuund… Who the frags that?”

Megatronus was certain his optic was twitching at this point and he felt his servos fist at his sides. “D45, your slave, your only fragging slave! Where. Is. HE? WHERE IS SOUNDWAVE!?” He asked furiously, his servo slamming onto the top of the desk as the older mech’s optics began to shutter closed. “WHERE THE FRAG IS HE!?”

When Tread’s faceplates suddenly paled even more so than they already were, Megatronus felt his spark freeze. “Ohhh, slag. Kid, the kid iss in the closset!” He looked up at Megatronus, horror fleeting across his faceplates. “I dun… I dun m-member how long…”

Megatronus was out of the room before the filth finished his slurred sentence. He raced down the halls trying desperately to remember where he had seen the closet that first time. **_He locked him away again and then FORGOT HIM! How long has he been in there!? Did he at least give him fuel!? FRAG IT ALL! I should have been there!_**

His optics were wide as they searched for something to jog his memory files about the horrible fragging room that held that odd closet cage. **_Please, please let me find it, please let him be alive! Ohhh, Primus if you fragging take Soundwave from me I swear…_**

His pedes slid across the metal floor with a resounding _screech_ as he noticed a familiar door. **_THERE!_** He pulled himself forwards. His servos digging into the wall as if it could propel him faster before ripping open the door  and finding the same dark metal door he had first seen when Soundwave had been locked away before. “Soundwave? Soundwave, you in there!?” He asked desperately as he went to turn the knob but found the door locked.

 ** _Arrrgh frag it! I forgot to ask for a key!_** He fell to his knees in front of the door and banged on it loudly. “Soundwave? Soundwave it is Megatronus!” He stopped talking, his helm pressed against the metal door as he listened carefully. **_Nothing! NOTHING!?_**

“Soundwave please… Please knock on the door if you hear me!?” He begged, his spark racing as he listened once more but only silence answered him.

He pulled his helm away, his optics wide, mad even as he stared at the dull pitted metal before him. “No. No… NOOO! SOUNDWAVE! _Fragger_ , ANSWER MEEE!” He grabbed ahold of the doorknob, his processor glitching as his servos clenched onto it tightly and he pulled backwards. “OPEEEEN! You will fragging OPENNNN!” He screamed wildly, his optics burning with tears as the metal door slowly began to pull outwards. The metal screeched and clunked as its form stretched from the immense and insane amount of force it was pulled with until finally, with a resounding shriek it was ripped from its hinges and Megatronus fell back, the door landing painfully on top of him as he did so.

“Arrrgh, fragging door…” He swore, flinging the door from his frame as he scrambled back up to his knees, his helm lifting as he looked into the little dark hole fearfully. Was he going to find a corpse, was he going to find Soundwave’s dark optics staring hopefully, desperately at the door before him!?

He hesitated a moment before adjusting his optics to the most sensitive setting and peering into the dark space. “S-Soundwave?” He asked softly, his spark a storm of chaos and terror when he suddenly saw two dim purple and blue optics flicker to life inside the darkness.

“Me-Mega…” The smaller mech was never able to finish he stuttered words as Megatronus whimpered and reached inside, wrapping his strong arms around the smaller mech carefully before pulling him out.

“You’re alive!? Ohhhh, frag it, you’re alive!” Megatronus cried, his optics shamelessly dripping coolant as he held tight to his friend.

Soundwave grimaced in his friend’s arms, his frame was still healing from his beating, and the pressure that surrounded him was only slightly uncomfortable comparably to the comfort he felt in being wrapped in the mech’s arms after days of darkness. “I still f-function.” He said weakly, his helm resting wearily against Megatronus’s chest plates as he vented in relief.

“Th-thank Primus!” A sob came from behind the two younglings, and both looked over to find Tread on his knees in the doorway to the room. The older mech was shaking terribly, his servos trembling over his open intake as tears fell from his optics.

“Yoooou.” Megatronus snarled as he held tighter to Soundwave’s frame, his arms shaking as he tried to control the fury, the _disgust_ that rippled through his frame. “You almost killed him. YOU ALMOST KILLED HIM!” He screamed, his optics blazing as his fears fell away and _rage_ took over. “ _YOU ALMOST KILLED HIIIIMMMMM!”_ Fire seared in his spark so fiercely that in that moment it felt as if it would melt through his plating. His processor became focused, silent, still as all of his focus singled in on the pitiful wreck of a bot that sobbed pathetically before him and he could taste death upon his glossa. **_He almost took him! He almost killed Soundwave from me! FROM MEEEE! I WILL TEAR HIM APA…_**

“Not so loud, Megatronus. P-please…”

The raging mech blinked, his frame easing at Soundwave’s meek plea and he turned his helm to peer down at his friend in confusion and concern.

Soundwave snuggled his helm against Megatronus, his weak vents whistling in the now silent room. “I am alright, ex-extra energon, Master.”

Tread watched with wide optics as Soundwave opened the subspace of his over-sized plating and turned it to empty out the few empty cubes that lie within. “I, I s-saved them Master… F-forgive m-me.”

Both Megatronus and Tread vented out at the sight, both knowing had it not been for the young mech’s smart thinking in storing his extra energon he would have probably have starved to death in the hole.

“I, I failed you kid. I, I don’t have… I don’t have the words…” The older mech said brokenly, his shaking servos wiping at his faceplates as he forced himself to his pedes. “No, no more closet… I, I can promise that at, at least.” He said quietly before walking off down the hall leaving Megatronus and Soundwave alone.

Megatronus growled at the now empty doorway but as Soundwave flinched at the sound he vented in deeply and made himself calm down. “Soundwave… I, I am so sorry.” He muttered sadly, but the smaller mech merely shook his helm.

“I am s-stronger… I can l-learn, I have learned.” He said wearily, his frame relaxing now that Megatronus wasn’t so tense.

“You, you are strong mech. Strong and a f-fragging w-wonder…” Megatronus stuttered out, his helm dropping low. As his anger left him, his sorrow, and horror came back full force and he felt overwhelmed by it all. “Ohhh… I can’t, I can’t s-save you. I c-can’t s-save an-anyone…” He moaned wretchedly as he began to cry in earnest. Megatronus hated crying, he saw it as a weakness but, but that he still had Soundwave... That he still had the only mech that really  _saw_  him, hugged him, _taught_ him in his whole life… “Please don’t leave me, Soundwave, I… I am n-not strong enough… I have b-been s-so, so alone… You're all I have, have ever had..."

Soundwave tilted his helm, his optics softening as he looked over the youth that held him and he realized he loved this mech. Perhaps it wasn’t like true love, perhaps it didn’t warrant a necklace like his Momma said but, but it was close, it was powerful and he would die before he lost it. “Th-thank you for f-finding me.” He said quietly, a small weak smile falling upon his faceplates as he lifted his servo. He placed it under the larger mech's helm, raising Megatronus’s until the larger mech's optics rose to meet his own, and could see the truth that resonated within them. “I kn-knew you would. I knew you would pull me from the d-darkness, as I know I w-would for y-you.”

Megatronus’s optics burned as he peered deeply into his friend’s optics. “Soundwave, p-please… Don’t, don’t leave me… I n-need you. I know that is a foolish r-request b-but without you I, I… I fear I am nothing.”

“You are something without me Megatronus,  but I won’t leave you. I need you too and I will fight to keep you. I will fight through it all by your side, you have my w-word. Until the end.” Soundwave said, his optics blazing and Megatronus sighed as he found nothing but truth, and conviction in his friend’s optics.

“Un-until the end.” Megatronus repeated with a small smile, his optics dimming as he scanned over the smaller mech’s pale faceplates. “Soundwave I, I almost lost you and I, I…” He muttered as he lowered his helm unconsciously, need and desperation guiding him as his lips found his friend’s and suddenly they were kissing.

Much like Soundwave, Megatronus knew he loved the smaller mech, and perhaps it wasn’t like the stories, perhaps it wasn’t that perfect sparkling tale kind of love but it was still real, just different.

Where those stories had mystery, magic, light and warmth, theirs was a story of desperation, of fear, of pain and through those storms they discovered a rock… A foundation in each other, something to keep them from falling away as the world was destroyed around them, or as the world sought to destroy them. They were each other’s sanctuary.

Soundwave whimpered as he tilted his helm, his dermas finding the right movements naturally as he had never kissed another bot like this before. He knew this wasn’t whole and it wasn’t pretty, but raw and real and honestly, that suited him just fine.

Everything in his life had always been raw, and painful since he ran away. It was lessons, punishments, rules, caution, Masters, fighting, and chains but with Megatronus... Well he was here too. He was stuck in this pit as well and as horrible as it may have sounded, Soundwave was so very grateful not to be alone in this.

They could be raw together, they could mourn together, cry together… Theirs was a pain that could be shared even if the other didn’t know the details of origin but the look… The look in their optics, the scars on their plating, the anger in their sparks…

Theirs was a need for comfort brought on by a lifetime of pain, and as the two young mechs kissed (by choice) for the first time in their lives, they both felt their sparks ease.

“I don’t want a life without you Soundwave.” Megatronus moaned against the smaller mech’s quivering lips and he felt  Soundwave smile in response.

“I will always be there for you, Megatronus.” Soundwave whispered, his dim optics looking into his friend’s blazing red ones as he pulled back a bit. “Like I said, until the end.”

Megatronus smiled as he cradled the smaller mech closer, his helm falling to the mech’s shoulder as he snuggled in close and whispered, “Till the end. I love you Soundwave, my friend, my brother.”

Soundwave chuckled softly, his tired optics shuttering as he held tight to the larger mech, gently patting his friend’s helm as he sighed. “And I you, Megatronus… With all my spark.”

Their lips came together once more, their sparks reaching for the comfort of the other as they let the world fade around them. For the moment it was just two lost sparks, two broken younglings searching for truth, for companionship, for comfort and, and there they found it... They found it deep within their fellow warrior, in their fellow slave... In, in a hidden place that held dreams for those bound and hopeless, in the only place even Master's could never truly touch without destroying... They found it in their sparks...

As Megatronus and Soundwave whimpered and pulled together tightly, their glossas curling and sliding together in unsure patterns of youth a singular thought echoed within them both.  

_**Sparkling tales be damned, that is for only the worthy to dream of but this... Let this rawness, this desperate connection persevere because this,THIS truly represents our life and no one will ever view us as more than this will they? Could they?** _

....

Far away in the dark dank basements of  the Iacon Archives a lone youth's optics blazed as he read over the odd file he found hidden amongst those scheduled for deletion.  _ **Primus... What, what is this? Who, who could have written something as passionate as this and... And is there more?**_


End file.
